Searching For Meaning And Joy

[00:00:02] Speaker A: All right, so this week, it's just. Just me again. And I'm recording this, like, well in advance of, you know, the usual, like, release day. But it's been a week since three of my friends died. And on a silver lining, they were all organ donors and, you know, like, livers and pancreases and heart valves went out to save 15 lives. So, I mean, like, that. That, you know, that. That's cool. That's a, you know, good silver. Silver lining to all this tragedy is, you know, 15 people get to, you know, go out and have a, you know, a second chance at life. But, you know, some of you are, you know, that are not my family are wondering what the fuck happened. And, you know, at the end of this episode, I'm. I'll, you know, probably put in some of Shelby's comedy, maybe some Emma's comedy, because I was the one that recorded all of that. So. A week ago in Durango, Colorado, one of my best friend, you know, two of my best friends were going through a divorce. It was really sad. And we were there for them. You know, we were, you know, a social, you know, support network for them. And, you know, they could talk to us. And, you know, it was sad on both ends. And it was my friends Shelby and Bradley that, you know, we're going through it. And Shelby's like, all right, well, I. I don't want anything, you know, bad to happen to Brad, so make sure you guys take care of him while we're going through this. And she truly loved him, and he truly loved her, and he wanted her back, and he wanted everything back the way it was. But, you know, sometimes, you know, divorce just needs to be a divorce. And, you know, if you just, you know, go back on everything, it didn't mean anything. So. So, yeah, they're, you know, going through that for about, like, a month. Like, it was, like, maybe a month or two months, you know, but I feel like it was, like, only like, a month, you know, where, you know, Shelby came in the group chat and, you know, you know, made the, you know, announcement after they had a fight, and I'm like, no way. That's. That's not happening. That. That's ridiculous. You guys are a power couple. And, you know, like, I talked to her, you know, later, and it was, you know, 100 true. And I'm like, this is, you know, sad, you know, just to see, like, one of my favorite, you know, married couples, you know, going through a divorce. But I'm like, okay, well, we'll. We'll you know, get through this as, like, you know, a group, as a, you know, huge family. And, you know, I, I thought we were doing okay. I thought, you know, everything was good. And I, I can never know what the fuck actually happened up until the point where, you know, Bradley came home on that Tuesday. But if I was to, you know, guess, I, I, you know, and I, this is, you know, Bradley was never one that ever wanted to hurt anybody. He was the type of person to, you know, lay in a puddle so you wouldn't get wet. He was the type of person to, you know, give you his jacket in a snowstorm. He was a type of person, you know, the kindest, most genuine person in the entire goddamn world. And I, I, I love both of them, Both Bradley and Shelby, you know, my best friends. And so, yeah, he came home and both, you know, Shelby and her best friend Emma were at home, you know, getting ready to take the dogs on a walk. You know, Emma brought her dog and, you know, Shelby had Coco, and they just, they were going on a walk. And if I was to guess, I would say that, you know, there was a fight. And both, you know, Shelby and Emma were never ones to back down. They were, you know, they're tough, formidable women. Tiny, tiny little girls with tough, formidable women that, you know, would never, you know, go, you know, back down from anything. And, you know, Bradley was, you know, deeply hurting and, you know, going through, like, you know, severe mental illness at this point, I'm sure, because he loves Shelby so God damn much. And I imagine, like, he just, you know, snapped. Just, you know, had like a instant, just. Yeah, you know, where every, you know, everything just goes black and just. I'm sure he just, like, pulled out a gun. Just trying to scare him or something. Just, like, off. Let me get my. Or, you know, whatever. Let me get a change of clothes, you know, because Bradley was staying in his truck. And, you know, I'm sure, like, a shot rang out and, you know, just didn't happen the way he, you know, he thought it was going to. He probably thought it was, like, gonna go through, like, the roof or, you know, scare him. Just like, oh, and, you know, and I, like, I know this man, he never, ever want to hurt them. And just that, that, that cloud of depression and blackness and anger and confusion ended up with, you know, both of them dead. And I'm sure he looked down and saw what it was. He knew. He knew that he had fucked up at such a fucking incredible level, and he didn't want to live In a world without Shelby, you know, he wanted everything, you know, like, I was, like, hoping, like, everything would work back out. And, you know, he'd go to therapy and, you know, they would work out their issues and. No, it just, you know, his wife and his wife's best friend were probably sitting there just shot in front of him, and just guilt and everything just came over him. And then he just took the gun and shot himself. And that's all she wrote. I mean, none of them survived, obviously, because they all donated organs. How fucked up would that be? You survive, and then it's like, hey, we're taking your organs anyway. It's like, I'm not dead. It's like, oh, we need this pancreas. God. And they were. All of them are just genuinely good fucking people. All of them were, you know, just genuinely awesome fucking friends. Like, we went out, like, I. I'm like, hey, I'm gonna, you know, come through town. I'm gonna bring my wife out. And Shelby was so excited, so fucking. Because I talk about my wife all the time, and she's like, oh, my gosh, I'm finally gonna get to meet your wife. And, you know, I brought her out, and everyone came out because, you know, everyone knows me. And I'm like, hey, my wife is gonna be in town. Everyone fucking showed up. Shelby was the first, and, you know, she's like, you're staying at our fucking house tonight. And, you know, I'm like, I can get a hotel. He's like, oh, no, no, no. Because the next day we're going to wake up and, you know, we went to the Grand Canyon together. We went out camping together, you know, just me, Shelby, Bradley, and my wife. And, you know, it was. It was, you know, the good days, you know, where everything was awesome. And, you know, Mondays were comedy, Wednesdays were karaoke, and Fridays were being a degenerate down at the Roadhouse. And we went out and played pool. We went out and, you know, you know, like. And, you know, comedy and karaoke and, like, I. I make custom karaoke songs for them that didn't exist. I'm like, boom. And on the 10th, you know, we're having the, you know, the bar scene, you know, like, celebration of life. And we're going to do comedy and karaoke and drag and, you know, aria is coming out, and it should be, you know, a good time. I'm gonna, you know, sing the songs that I made for them and would have, like, a. Know all the comedy, everything that, you know, Shelby ever did. That I've ever recorded. And it's a lot. And Emma recorded a lot of her own stuff. So that, that's also out there. And I'm gonna, you know, have that, you know, playing outside and, you know, just Shelby and Emma will be the stars of the night. And I'm trying to do like, you know, fun stories. And I remember there is one night that Shelby almost got me and Brad arrested, you know, because she, she was a small, you know, like, like a five foot nothing girl, you know, like 100 pounds soaking wet. And, you know, alcohol hit her hard and, you know, anytime she got drunk, she, you know, turned to a little drunk Olympian. And we, you know, every time she was drunk and we were all walking home together, you know, we'd call it, you know, you know, Shelby's drunk Olympics. And she would, you know, start running and jumping off of stuff and, you know, kicking cones over and just, you know, being like a little gremlin menace. But, you know, it's fun, you know, because she'd like, run ahead and, you know, like, wait for us all to catch up. And it was just me and Bradley just kind of shooting the shit and walking, you know, and we always had like, you know, these deep conversations, you know, and, you know, there was one night that she was doing her drunk Olympian thing just after having like gin and tonics. And, you know, she's just running well ahead. And, you know, me and Bradley are just like walking together, just getting kind of slow and just, you know, keeping an eye on her, making sure she's okay because she would drop her vape and drop her phone, phone all the time and just drop all of her stuff. So it's like a little relay race, just back and forth. Oh, no. You know, and, you know, one night a cop sees her, sees this little white girl running away from like two mysterious dudes, obviously, dudes. And you know, I, I see that I, I clock the cop making the left hand turn like as, you know, Shelly rounds a corner, you know, and I, I, you know, I look at Bradley, I'm like, I bet you that cops for us. And he didn't even notice the cop. He's like, what cop? I'm like, there's a cop, you know, sitting up here that's gonna, you know, have Shelby. And he's like, no, you're crazy, dude. You know, you're just, you know, you see cops because you're a brown guy. And I'm like, you know, just watch. And so we round the corner and, you know, we see Shelby Bawling her eyes out, just trunk. And, you know, the cop just sitting there with her, his hand on her shoulder, you know, and, you know, she. The cops, like, do, you know these two gentlemen? And, you know, at that point, she could have, like, no, I don't know them. Thank you so much, Officer. And we would have gone in cuffs in the back of the car, never to see the light of day again. But she's like, no, this is my husband and my best friend. And he's like, all right, maybe stop, you know, having her run around. And so, you know, Shelby's sitting there still crying, you know, thinking that she's in trouble or something. Like, you're not in trouble. And I look over at, you know, Bradley, and I'm like, bradley, you need to, you know, get her a leash. And he looks at me, you know, with that devious smile is like, oh, I already have a leash. She just can't wear it in public. I'm just like. And Shelby just turns feet red and just like, oh, my gosh, Bradley. You know, and just, you know, salvage the rest of the walk home. And, you know, every night, like, we would get to, like, the gas station across the street from my hotel, you know, where we, like, break apart and, you know, goes to her house and I go to my hotel, and we'd go in, we'd get rollers, and we'd get snacks. Just the end of the night, you know, hey, you know. You know, drunk foods and whatnot. And, like, you know, we'd wait at the corner for, like, the cars to stop coming. And, you know, Shelby would look at me and beg, alex. Yeah. Get across the street safely. Don't die. And. And then, you know, I'd get across the street, and she'd be like, we love you, Pacheco. And I'm back. I love you guys, too. And I'll see you next time I'm in town, you know, which was three times a week. And that. That's just. That's gone. So. But, yeah, I mean, and there is one time that, you know, Shelby and Bradley came out to my house because Shelby is a huge Star Trek nerd. Loves everything. Star Trek doesn't matter. The Generation. She's seen all of it, knew all the lore, you know, new Klingon. I don't even know any of that, you know, nonsense. And apparently, William Shatner was supposed to. Yeah, well, he was. He was at the Comic Con by my house, you know, literally walking distance away. And, you know, Shelby really wanted to do that, and so she took time off and she like, hey, you know, we're coming down to your place. And I'm like, yeah, come on down. You know, and, you know, I bought tickets for me and my wife and they already had the tickets. And you know, we go in and, you know, this was during like the writer strike. So, like, I get into the room, like, I, I, I sit and wait in line, you know, like I'm supposed to, because, you know, Shelby was not used to all this. And so I'm like sitting wait in line. I'm like texting Shelby. I'm like, shelby, where the hell are you? This line's about to get moving. And I, this room does not look big. And it was a tiny little, little room, you know, maybe like 50 people, you know, got into this room. And he only did like one of these. It wasn't like, you know, you know, rotating thing is like one done. And so I'm like frantically, you know, because, you know, I, I got in line just, just in case, like, I need to switch spots with Shelby because, like, this was a whole reason she came, a hundred percent of the reason, you know, other than me. But, and she was literally the last one they let in. She was standing up. And, you know, I look back and I see her get in the room and she's bouncing with excitement. She is fucking stoked on life. She is so happy to have gotten in the room and I am so happy that she got in the room. And you know, she's sitting there, but, you know, William Shatner gets up and it's during the writers strike, so he can't talk about Star Trek at all, you know, so he's just going on rambling old man stories like, non stop for like an hour. But it did not matter to Shelby. It's like he's right there, like 10ft away. And, you know, she was able to like, you know, shake his hand and, you know, just sh. Over by the door. And William Shatner was like, you know, escorted out before the rest of us. And, you know, it, it made her entire, you know, trip out here. She was so excited. And then, you know, since she's like, you know, lived in like the boonies all her life. I, you, I'm like, all right, you know, tonight we're going to go downtown and we're going to like, go hit up some bars. But it, it's not as walkable as you would think. It's not as walkable as, you know, Durango is where you can walk from one end of the Edge to the other, and, you know, it's fine, you know, so we get downtown, and she's like, what? She. Like, like, Durango doesn't have any buildings over three stories, and we have skyscrapers in Colorado Springs. We have giant. Like, giant. Relatively. You know, I've been in New York, so I, like, I've seen, like, real giant buildings. But she was, you know, impressed. Like, what. That building is so big. I'm like, that's a hotel. That's a little bell. That's a bank. You know, it's like, what. She was losing her mind. And, you know, she was, like, looking for, like, little dive bars, and she found a few. And, like, I took her out to, like, one of my favorite spots that she could, like, eat the food at. You know, it's like this vegetarian place called Salad or Bust. And, you know, know, we did comedy out there and walked around downtown, you know, like, kind of, like, crashed a wedding even. And, you know, we got, like, you know, invited into the wedding. It was like, just, you know, the things that, you know, you never even, you know, like, it's movie type, you know, and we're, you know, sitting there playing pool and, you know, meeting everybody and, you know, like, all right, have a wonderful life. Yeah. And just like, you know, so, like, I. I just. Yeah. I mean, they. They were. They were good people, and this shouldn't happen to anybody. So if you have, you know, friends that you haven't talked to in a while, you know, reach out to them, talk to them, you know, like, hey, what's up? How are you doing? You know, like. And I don't have, you know, too many like that. And, you know, my best friend, I, you know, we send each other memes all the time. We talk on the phone, and he'll rant and me like, oh, this is, you know, awful. And, you know, he knows, you know, to call me anytime. You know, I'll probably pick up, you know, but it's. This is like a. A deep pa. And I. I sincerely hope that no one else in the world has to ever deal with something like this. Like, there's only two situations that I could ever imagine being worse than this, and one is, you know, losing your spouse, you know, to any reason. And, you know, like, the. The first worst is, like, losing your child. You know, like, I. I was there when one of my mentors, you know, like, we. You know, he hadn't heard from his son in, you know, a while, and, you know, we went out looking for him, and, you know, I I was with him when, you know, he got news that they had found the body of his son. And, you know, his son was not alive. And it's like, you know, the deep, you know, primal scream from his wife, that. That. That's, you know, all the sadness, I'm sure, that I. I felt just didn't want. Just burst. And I. I couldn't imagine, like, that. That's, like, part of the reason why I'm, you know, terrified of ever having a kid. It's like, you know, what if my kid dies? It's like I just have to, like, die, too. But enough of all that, you know, sad. I'm, you know, at this point, I'm gonna, you know, put in some, you know, probably like, just, like, full sets that, you know, Shelby and both. And Emma both have done. Bradley never did comedy. He did it once. He, like, did, like, some, you know, like, improv once. And, you know, I. I promised not to record it for him, and, like, that was like. His whole thing is, like, do not ever record this. And, you know, so he got up and he did it once. But, yeah, that's just, you know, lost time, I guess. But, yeah, we. We would go out, and every time it was their birthday, we do birthday roasts of them. And. And, you know, Shelby always had jokes, because in Durango, there's this event every year called Snowdown in winter, and it happens during her birthday. There's always, like, a parade. And her. Her mom would lie and say, hey, I did this parade for you. And, yeah, this. This Snowdown is gonna be a rough one. Yeah, this is definitely, you know, the. The. This pain is just, you know, something that just sucks through and through. So if you have, you know, loved ones in your life, and this is just me being real. This is me being raw. You know, you can call it gay. I don't care. But, you know, if you have people that you truly, you know, care about, you know, spend every day with them, like, it's gonna be their last. You never know what's gonna, you know, bring tomorrow. Like, I. I would have, you know, if this was, like, a betting line. It's like, you know, oh, Bradley and Shelby dying before me. No, I'll put all my money on that. And I would have lost everything. Like, you know, I always joke that I was gonna be the, you know, the next one to die. You know, being unhealthy truck driver on the road over, you know, the most dangerous passes, the most dangerous driving conditions. You know, I'm like, you guys better. You Know, set up my funeral and do it good. I'm like, I want cocaine there, I want hookers there. I want alcohol there. Yeah, I, I want the, you know, know, I want it to be a party. I don't want it to ever be, you know, something sad. Just know I died doing what I enjoy, and they, they didn't. They didn't die doing what they enjoyed. They, they died probably arguing and screaming and, and just. And, And I, I, I deeply hope that we can, you know, get a cleaning crew to come the on out and, you know, clean up their house. Like, I, I, I can't bring myself to, you know, go see their house, but, like, if it's something that, you know, needs to get done and I get, you know, I, I volunteered. And if it's something that I get called upon to, you know, go do, I will 100% do it. I will be crying the entire time, but, you know, to, you know, just, you know, fix their, you know, they live in a trailer, and it was all paid off and, you know, if I'd be like, oh, I live in a house and you guys live in a trailer. Like, oh, yeah, our trailer's all paid off, you know. Is your house paid off? Like, damn, deep burns. But, yeah, no, they were good people. So, yeah, you know, after this, you know, on the 24th, we have, like, the main, you know, like, church, you know, and they call it a celebration of life. And it's like, I don't know if that makes it better. Not going to be out there celebrating, that's for damn sure. Be out there crying my eyes out. I'm just wondering when is going to be, like, the first day that I can get through the entire day without crying, without even thinking about it and just be like, oh, yeah. Boom, boom, boom, boom. And it's gonna be a while. So enough of that, you know, all sad stuff. I'm gonna, you know, here, I'm gonna insert. It's probably, like a weird jump cut it. I don't know. And then, you know, I might put in, like, a little, you know, boop, you know, in between, you know, both Shelby and him, I'll probably just, like, do one set each of them, you know, I, I want, you know, them to be remembered for being, you know, talented and funny and with their whole lives ahead of them and just how full of joy they were, how funny they were. And, yeah, just. I want them to, I want everyone to be like, oh, yeah, no, the, these were, you know, th. This was good. So, you know, boom. And. And thank you all so much for, you know, being here. My family's been reaching out, and that. That's not. That's nice, you know, like, my mom's like, you want me to fly out there? I'm like, no, I don't. I don't need more Californians here. You go back home and talk to my grandma about it. But, yeah, I mean, that. That. That's everything that's happened. So after this, I'll probably take, like. Like, at least next week. And I'm just. There's just not. I'm not gonna, you know, do an update. I'm not gonna, you know, sit here and cry. And, like, that's gonna be a really raw day. I've talked to my boss, and he's like, whatever day you ever need off for this, you know, just tell me and we'll get you taken care of. And I. I really appreciate, like, my work, you just working with me on this. And you know what sucks is I have to, you know, drive out to Trango to, you know, be with everybody. So it's like, on my route. So it's like I have to work to get out there. And. Yeah. So. But boom. Enjoy some. You know, Shelby and Emma, you know, they're both hilarious and they're both great. And, you know, now you can kind of, you know, get like a little glimpse into who they are. Here you go. Boom. [00:34:45] Speaker B: Welcome our next comic to the stage. She is a five foot something firecracker. She's dressed like a 50s slut tonight. And so that message over to the stage sitting right in front of me, Shelby Campbell. Thank you to the five foot something. It's actually five foot nothing but close. So I don't do comedy a lot. I actually just really like public speaking. But my views are too extreme for politics, so here I am. Not true. I just have no original thoughts, so I would be terrible at politics. I learned this the first time I voted for Lauren Boebert. And in my defense, I met her, I knew nothing about her. I worked downtown, and she came in and was looking at my case of jewelry that I make, and I was like, yes, a victim. I was like, those earrings look so good on you. You should get them. [00:35:44] Speaker A: And she's. [00:35:45] Speaker B: She's like, if I get these, will you vote for me? And I was like, what's your name? Dawn. I will vote for you. And that's how I voted for Lauren Bever. And then I learned more about her, and I was like, this bitch is messy. I kind of love you. [00:36:00] Speaker A: Did you. [00:36:01] Speaker B: Hear she vaped at a Beetlejuice, like live showing after leaving her long term husband. I'm like, that's not very Republican of you, ma'. [00:36:10] Speaker A: Am. [00:36:12] Speaker B: Kind of messy. So now I do love her. I might do it again if she buys more jewelry from me. Honestly, I can be bought and I will be bought. Recently I worked at a store that may or may not be Beads and Beyond. It's definitely Beads and Beyond. I get a lot of people that come in and say stupid shit to me, like, what does this crystal do for you? [00:36:36] Speaker A: What does it mean? [00:36:38] Speaker B: And I'm like, rub it on your titties and tell me. [00:36:40] Speaker A: I don't know. [00:36:42] Speaker B: And I was just. Honestly, you. [00:36:44] Speaker A: You'll get this. [00:36:45] Speaker B: I was in a luteal phase. I was like in. I was in that like, I want to fucking crack a skull on a pavement phase of my menstrual cycle. So when a bitch came to me, I was like, what does this stone do? I was like, it actually has no industrial purposes and it was for my. Primarily used in jewelry. And she's like, no, no, no. [00:37:05] Speaker A: What? [00:37:05] Speaker B: No, what does it do metaphysically? And I told her, I was like, hold it to your chest and tell me because she had nice tits. I was like, I don't know, let's just hold it here and see what happens. I was like, let's Google this together. We can learn about the Internet. And so we Google was stupid and dumb and I hated it. And she was like, what's you even believe in? And I was like, capitalism. Give me your amex. [00:37:34] Speaker A: Give me, give me. [00:37:35] Speaker B: I love it. She had a black Amex. I knew it too. I could just sense it with that Louis Vuitton purses. If you have money. I'm like an Amex girl. I can sense them. I'm gonna do some old material tonight, cuz. A very special lady is here. Give it up for Jason's aunt L. Learning too much about me. So I'm one of God's favorites, obviously. Which means I was not adopted until after the towers fell and I was nine years old. I miss some shit, okay? Not having a steady home or family until you're nine years old. And one of those things was what animals are and are not real. I was homeschooled because obviously America's going to war. And my parents were preparing me and I had sick Echo the Dolphin Lisa Frank stationary. We were. I lived in Iowa at the time. I'm doing my homework with my dolphin stationary. And I was like, I wish we could have a dolphin. I still wish I could have a dolphin, by the way. And my mom's like, oh, is that cuz we live in Iowa? And I was like, no, Tammy, it's cuz they're not real. I was like, I know what you want. And my mother was like, not the time to tell her no. She didn't tell me dolphins were real. I was nine. I should have known. No, she waited two weeks and took me to the Henry Doerley Zoo in Omaha, Nebraska, where dreams come true, guys. [00:39:05] Speaker A: Okay? [00:39:07] Speaker B: That bitch showed me a dolphin. I. I was gone. I was like, how did you do this, Echo? In person, like in real life. I was seeing Echo and my mother and her southern doll said, God gave them to me to give them to you. She took credit. And I live my life in a way that takes credit for shit I don't do all the time now because she was an icon. Oh yeah. I also missed more steps along the way as any homeschooled child would. I had to start doing public events with other children because the state of Colorado demanded it in the year 2006. They were like, oh, you guys are all abusing your children. They should see other abused children and do activities together. So my parents were like, let's send her scheme. That's perfect. It's physical. We have the money for it. Let's blow it on that. How is a six? I'm so ashamed. I was 16 on my first winter skiing outing. And I'm on lift 10 in Telluride. Anyone know lift 10? It's a long ass lift. I'm next to this guy and he's like, do you want to kiss? And my thought process, I was like, my parents are getting divorced and getting pregnant with Satan's seed would be better. So I said yes to to the kiss, like any reasonable person would. And then I went skiing all day, very carefully holding my belly like, oh, I don't want to lose the baby. Gotta be careful. And then I went home and told my father that night that I was pregnant. I hate that this is true. I'm so sorry. And I looked my dad in the eyes and I was like, dad, I am pregnant. And he had questions in the wrong fucking order. He said, who? And I'm a whore and did not get the name. And so now I'm a virgin whore. And he said, where? And I said, on the ski lift. I'm still a voyeur. Let's be real. I love a good cuck. To this day, but in a more literal Sense back then, it was just kissing. He didn't ask where the instructor was. The instructor was right behind me. And so, boy, that I randomly kissed. So, yeah, my dad eventually figured out it happened a couple hours ago. And like any good father, what he said, you told me early enough. We can pray this baby away still. We have time. And I believed in God when I got my next period. I tell you that. Thank you so much. I've been totally Campbell. [00:42:03] Speaker A: Yeah, keep it going. [00:42:05] Speaker B: She turned the damn mic off. Campbell, everybody. Oh, she's so right about Lauren Boebert. She's like, she's a messy gal. And I'm like, that was. She is a messy gal. If me and Lauren Boebert went to high school together, we would have smoked weed in my Ford Taurus one time. She would have, like, had a panic attack in the passenger seat and looked over at me and called me a. And then we never would have talked again throughout the whole wrestling. That's Laurence Boebert. [00:42:30] Speaker A: Listen. All right, and so that was. That was Shelby. You know, she was always fucking hilarious. I have a smaller clip of Emma. You know, I don't have like all of her, you know, stuff, but she, she was fucking hilarious too. You know, she. She lived in Taos and so. Yeah, yeah, I'll play that and then go ahead and end the episode. I. I'm not gonna do anything this Saturday. I'm just gonna relax. Friday is some services, so. Yeah, but. But yeah, I mean, none of them would ever want us to be sad. None of them would ever, you know, want us to be sitting here crying. And. Yeah, so here's Emma. And then, you know, have a good night. And, you know, you know, we'll come back to this. When we come back to this, probably gonna be a couple weeks. I definitely am not going to do anything next week. But yeah, so enjoy like a minute of Emma. [00:43:51] Speaker B: I was very self conscious about my singing voice for a very long time because my mom once stopped the music in the car. I was probably 11. And she was like, you know that your voice is like really nasally, right? And that broke my soul, you know, that really, I was just like, I'm not singing around people anymore. My mom was like, I don't think that lessons will help. I think it's just the way that you are. Yeah, I do love my mom, but she had some problems. But anyway, so I went for most of my life thinking I had the shittiest singing voice ever. And then I went to visit for my little brother's birthday. And we were all in the car going to see the Batman, and we were singing a song, and she was like, emma, you have a super pretty singing voice. I never knew. And I just replied, yeah, I've been working on it because of you. This is your fault. This is why I go to karaoke every week even though I'm sober, and it's terrifying.