Blaze It

[00:00:01] Speaker A: Alrighty, everybody. Welcome to the fucking 420 blaze it fucking human podcast. Ah, man, I haven't smoked weed in like a decade. But I'm Alex atruck, your host, the one with the most titties. I got my wife over here. [00:00:22] Speaker B: I have the most titty. [00:00:24] Speaker A: No, that's good. And then we got Courtney from across the land. [00:00:28] Speaker B: Yep. [00:00:30] Speaker A: So today is 420. I hope all you delinquents out there are smoking weed or vaping weed or eating weed or having weed on yourselves or whatever the fuck you do now. Like that. That's the thing that kind of like, gets me all fucking weirded out. As a younger man, as someone that was young and just started smoking weed, we didn't have any of that. We didn't have, you know, vapes or gummies. You know, we might have like a brownie, a cookie, and then fucking. Just straight weed. [00:01:08] Speaker B: Ugh. You were in the rough phase. Oh, I'm so sorry you had to go through that like that. That's a pioneer. I'm so sorry, babe. [00:01:18] Speaker A: Oh. Like, we made fucking canna butter and we had no idea how strong it was. Yeah, we just fucking. We're like, either nothing will happen or you'll see God. One of the two, literally. [00:01:32] Speaker B: Your weed butter was so unpredictable and I loved it. [00:01:38] Speaker A: It was great. It was the best. [00:01:41] Speaker B: It was the best. I'm not gonna lie. [00:01:45] Speaker A: Yeah, I might make it again one day. [00:01:49] Speaker B: Yeah, no, I'm never doing weed butter again. [00:01:53] Speaker A: What? You don't want to fucking. [00:01:55] Speaker B: It was nasty. It got me high. But it was nasty. It was nasty. [00:02:02] Speaker A: How dare you? But yeah, that's what we had back in the days. We didn't have any of the fun ways to get high. We didn't have Flintstone vitamin fucking get you high gummies. We just had, you know, hey, fuck you. Here's a baggie of weed from a questionable source. And hopefully it's not an undercover that'll take you to jail for 15 years. [00:02:30] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:02:30] Speaker A: Yeah. Cause I lived back in the days where smoking weed was illegal. I still smoke weed. It was cool. And now, like, fucking church pastors are smoking weed. I hate that. Yeah, you know, fucking 420 is just an excuse for stoners to get high. Not that they need one. You know, you. You can be a stoner out there and be like, oh, man, my. I'm awake and my eyes are open too much fucking, you know, hit a bong rip. Ah. Oh, man, I'm at work fucking, let's go out to the car and fucking smoke a fat one. Yeah, my mom is calling, you know? Get me that, dube. Oh, man, I'm playing call of duty. Let me get a blunt. So it's okay for me to say the n word because black people smoke blunts, too, and it's okay, you know, I used to be a stoner as well. And I would say, like, one of my favorite fucking things is about being a stoner. All in all was the food. You know, where I would make food? I don't remember. Like, when my wife was my girlfriend, she would just, like, come in my apartment sometimes unannounced, while I'm making some fucking wild concoction of food. You know, it's like, baloney's in the microwave. And she's like, I have to talk to you about something. I'm like, oh, God, please not. Don't be pregnant. Like, that's it. That's all I'm asking. Don't fucking be pregnant. Get out of here, mochi. Shoot. Get up there then. Then get up there, asshole. [00:04:19] Speaker B: Well, she has her extra space now. [00:04:21] Speaker A: Yeah. I fucking spent a bunch of money to give my cat extra space. But, you know, she, like, come in the door, I'm, like, f freaking out because I didn't tell her I smoked weed. She had no idea. She was a good little christian girl. [00:04:36] Speaker B: Okay. No, no, no. I was, like, low key escaping from a really bad situation. I had no idea how any of this shit worked. I was just taking a hiding place. I apologize. It must have been really. I can't believe you put up with that. [00:04:52] Speaker A: Yeah, I must hit you a few times. But, like, I'd be, you know, making stone soup and just putting whatever I could find in a pot. Make, you know, water and fucking paprika that makes a broth a fucking questionable potato cut up. You know, throw it in there, get some fucking turkey from the fridge. You know, rip it up and throw it in the pot. And, oh, look, I have an onion. Chop that bitch up through. Throw it in. [00:05:26] Speaker B: Yeah. And the basic ingredients of a roux. [00:05:29] Speaker A: And then every once in a while, it would turn out amazing. And then other times, it would not turn out amazing. And the worst is when either a, I would get too stoned to, you know, be cooking and forget about the pot. You know, be too, you know, preoccupied with my pot to, you know, check on the other pot, and I'd have a burnt fucking pot. Or it turned out awful, and I just left it in the fridge for months. And I did that with a canned chicken, a whole can chicken. Like, a chicken in a can fucking poured it in a pot, fucking added some bay leaves and some other horseshit. Turned out awfully. Left it in there for, like, six months. And, you know, one of my roommates is like, what is this? Cracked it. And like, what the fuck is this? We ended up taping the fucking pot lid down. We grabbed, like, just tape that we had in the house or in the apartment, and we just taped that bitch down and threw the entire pot away. [00:06:43] Speaker B: What did it smell like? [00:06:46] Speaker A: Okay, take a fucking dead chicken and then just put it in fucking, you know, pour water and then let it decompose over six months. And then you crack the lid on that, and it's just, you know, like, bacteria thrived in that. They're like, oh, cool fucking buffets for years. [00:07:08] Speaker B: Like, what else did it feel like? Like, what was the color? What was the smell? [00:07:13] Speaker A: Oh, we didn't look at the color. We cracked it like a millimeter. And we're like, no, I didn't want. It's like when you take a massive diarrhea shit and you just flush it without even standing up. [00:07:27] Speaker B: What did it smell like? [00:07:30] Speaker A: Like death and fucking mole. [00:07:33] Speaker B: That's all I needed. [00:07:34] Speaker A: It smells smelled like the worst fucking. It smelled bad enough for me to throw, like, a $25 pot in the garbage without thinking about it. I'm like, I could, you know, save this pot, but it's worth more than $25 to my nose. [00:07:51] Speaker B: Nah. [00:07:52] Speaker A: So we're just gonna throw the entire bitch away. I did that with, like, two other pots. Like, no, no. And, like, my other favorite thing was having high thoughts where you have these profound thoughts while on marijuana, where you're just, like, sitting there. Be like, I wonder if back in the Bible days, getting stoned wasn't actually done with rocks. They just bring over a big ass bong and make you fucking rip that shit. Oh, you're being disrespectful to your parents. Rip this shit. And, like, biblical weed was, like, of biblical proportions. So, like, they had to, like, rip, like, a lot of it. And they're like, oh, fuck, I'm sorry, mom. I love you so much. And that's why they're all so fucking peaceful back in the day. [00:08:47] Speaker B: I recently found out that we started farming marijuana before we started farming potatoes and wheat. [00:08:53] Speaker A: Man. Like, that must suck. It's like, man, I'm fucking have the munchies. Does anybody have french fries? What are french fries? [00:09:01] Speaker B: French fries are a blessing to everyone on this. [00:09:04] Speaker A: Uh, I don't know, but we should make some potatoes and make some french fries. What are potatoes? I don't know either. It's like, I have $0.93. You know what that means? I don't have enough money for chicken nuggets. [00:09:25] Speaker B: The true horror of life. [00:09:29] Speaker A: But, yeah, it's like. And then my friends would look at me and be like, shut up, Alex. Stop trying to use your brain. Then I'd be like, what if everyone in America just stopped paying rent all at once? And like, one of my friends would be like, everyone would get evicted. Duh. It's like, well, wait, hold up. Now. See, to get evicted, you have to go through the courts. And every landlord in America would fucking be lining up to get their fucking tenants evicted. And there'd be fucking lines around the fucking building to get into the fucking courthouse to evict your tenant. And, like, they'd have to, like, let the fucking people that are actually there for court come in first. And it would be months or even years before, you know, the courts, you know, get to them and then, you know, even longer before they can get to us to, you know, issue the fucking eviction verdict. [00:10:31] Speaker B: Having to wait years for a court date has always completely blown my mind. Like, what the fuck wrong with our society that this situation is happening? [00:10:40] Speaker A: Because sometimes single fucking cases will take multiple, multiple fucking days. [00:10:48] Speaker B: Yeah, we should have a rulebook that takes much less time. [00:10:54] Speaker A: But it's like, yeah, I mean, it is what it is. And for some people, it's great. And for some people, really fucking sucks because, you know, you'll go to fucking jail and you can't fucking post bail because you're too goddamn poor. And by the time you get to your fucking court appointment, you've already served the amount of time that it would, you know, more time than, you know would have been for your original crime. [00:11:19] Speaker B: Yeah, it's bullshit. The court system's bullshit. We should have a rulebook. 24 hours. Either you're good or you're dead. [00:11:29] Speaker A: Yeah, but that's not how it works. But back. Back to my. Back to my high thought, it's like, you know, you'd be sitting there for, you know, months, years, or even the rest of your life and never have to fucking pay rent ever again. And by the time they actually fucking do come through with this order, you can get the fuck out of there and you have ten years of fucking rent saved up, and you can go buy a house. And now that the entire housing market has crashed, fucking houses are goddamn dirt cheap. And you can just go to your landlord and be like, hey, you know, you already know that no one else is ever going to fucking pay you rent ever again. I will give you $10,000 right now and you sign over the fucking house to me and you're done with it. You don't ever have to deal with it ever again. And some landlords will go for it. And then you fucking own a house. Or if the fucking bank takes back the house, then you're fucking sitting in that thing and the cycle starts all over again. And so now you have squatters rights and you know, go fuck yourself, bank. This is my house free. And then my friends would look at me and be like, that's kind of genius. But it. There's no way it would work. I'm like, yeah, the same thing. If everyone committed crimes or if everyone stopped working, like, the entire system would fucking collapse and all the rich assholes of America would fucking be in financial ruin immediately. [00:13:09] Speaker B: So what do you want? Do you want utopia or do you want world peace? [00:13:14] Speaker A: It's the same thing. [00:13:15] Speaker B: No, it's not. [00:13:18] Speaker A: I just don't want there to be 1% of the population that controls 99% of all the fucking money. Like, that's what I want. I want fucking, you know, every. I like, anytime I see someone that makes $25,000 a year working 40 hours a week, I'm like, that's bullshit. If you're working 40 hours a week, you should be able to, you know, afford, you know, like $4,000 a month. Like after taxes. Like, that's what that should be. You know, your base minimum, 4000 a month after taxes. Everyone at least making $50,000 a year. [00:13:59] Speaker B: Well, no, that was the whole point of the agreement though. Like 40 hours was supposed to equal enough money to live comfortably. [00:14:07] Speaker A: Yeah, $50,000 was the deal. It is enough to live pretty fucking comfortably. [00:14:12] Speaker B: And yet the promise has been broken. [00:14:16] Speaker A: Yep. And that. That's tough betrayed, so. But yeah, I mean, I would love to fucking be able to smoke some weed, but, you know, I have one of them jobs. It just does not allow me to fucking smoke weed. Like, the government really wants to know what's inside my pee pee. [00:14:39] Speaker B: And that makes you a responsible worker. You understand the rules and you will respect the rules. [00:14:45] Speaker A: I don't respect them at all. I think it's a bunch of horseshit, but I have to do what I have to do to fucking keep my job. [00:14:53] Speaker B: Exactly. It's admirable. [00:14:54] Speaker A: Like, you know, I don't respect my boss at all. [00:14:58] Speaker B: There's difference between respecting laws and respecting your boss. [00:15:02] Speaker A: No respect. Like, I have to obey my boss. Whatever my boss says, I have to say, yes, sir, and fucking get it done. But I don't respect him. [00:15:11] Speaker B: But there's not laws there. [00:15:15] Speaker A: No, I. I don't have to respect the laws either. I think fucking taxes are fucking theft, you know, but I have to fucking pay the taxes or I have to pay the fucking price of prison. The IR's has the power to do that for some fucking reason. Money's weird and it's like, you know, but if everyone in America just stopped paying taxes, that too. What are they gonna do? There ain't shit they can. Oh, you know, everyone just stopped paying taxes. Oh, no, I guess the government just fucking collapses immediately. Or all the rich people have to step up and start paying hella hard. [00:15:58] Speaker B: That's why they have it hourly. Wait, like, it automatically. [00:16:04] Speaker A: Unless, like, you can fucking claim ten on your taxes. [00:16:08] Speaker B: Huh? [00:16:09] Speaker A: You can claim whatever you want on your taxes. So you can be like, yeah, I'm gonna fucking claim ten on my taxes. And then they don't take out any tax. [00:16:20] Speaker B: Yeah, a lot of people don't know that. [00:16:23] Speaker A: Hey, people, you know, if you all want to, if everyone in America fucking hears this podcast, like, this is the only one they hear, stop paying your taxes. If everyone in America does it, three, shit they can do. They can, you know, go up and fucking suck our nuts. You know, fucking people will start getting arrested, but it's gonna be a long fucking road. And, you know, the lines around the fucking building for the fucking, you know, evictions and, you know, now the IR's trying to convict people. Oh, man, it's gonna be fucking backed up courts for fucking years. And by the time your fucking court appearance happens, guess what? It's 150 years down the road and you're dead. Doesn't matter anymore. Yeah, and the economy of the entire United States would fucking collapse, too. It'd be bad. We'd be like a third world country over here. Because guess what? You know, the roads are no longer getting fixed. You know, refineries aren't getting money. No one gives a shit anymore. You know, it'll be anarchy for sure. And fucking weak people will die. [00:17:31] Speaker B: They've only fixed part of the roads that I drive to commute to work. They fix, like, parts of it. It's so weird. Like, they're not just, like, repaving it from, like, the beginning to the end. They're just done, like, patches and it's like. But the whole road needs to be done. It's awful. [00:17:49] Speaker A: Yeah, no, they're fucking Colorado Springs road construction crews are fucking goddamn brain dead. They fucking look for the most retarded people they possibly can. It's like, oh, yeah, I have my college degree in, you know, engineering or whatever and, you know, civil engineering. And I can be a huge asset. Like, ugh, no, get out of here, nerd. And it's like, just like a bunch of football jocks just, you know, running the entire thing. They're a bunch of fucking idiots. I hate them all. But I honestly think I'm the only one that I know that does not smoke weed. [00:18:39] Speaker B: Well, I mean, you really can't. It's not that you don't want to. [00:18:44] Speaker A: Yeah, I. Well, I mean, at this point, you know, I can take it or leave it. You know, like, if someone's like, hey, you know, now you can smoke weed as a truck driver, I'll be like, I don't care anymore. I'm already over the fucking hump. Hi, I'm back to virgin lungs again. Nah, nah, nah. [00:19:10] Speaker B: I was listening to this song and it's like the stupidest song ever. I don't know if it's Taylor Swift or not, but like, it was talking about like, how I used to be crazy, but that was when I was young. I'm sorry, you're old? [00:19:24] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, I'm so crazy. Uh. [00:19:33] Speaker B: Babe, what is the rv at your midlife crisis? [00:19:38] Speaker A: So, okay. You can't just bring up shit like that in the middle of a podcast without fucking bringing in. Um, you know, I'm sorry. [00:19:49] Speaker B: I'm having my high thought. [00:19:50] Speaker A: She is having her. My wife, you know, is celebrating, you know, 420 the right way. [00:19:56] Speaker B: I am indeed. Thank you. [00:19:58] Speaker A: So the other day I was doing some substance, some substances, because I'm not a saint and I don't give a shit, but these ones are not detectable. And I had a thought. I'm in my backyard. Are you farting over there? [00:20:18] Speaker B: No. I'm laughing so hard. I'm snorting so I'm trying to cover my nose. [00:20:23] Speaker A: So, you know, I'm like, going through my backyard. I'm like, how can I make this area fucking bitchin? And so I'm like, looking at like, I have like a lean to, half a shed and I'm like, well, what if I fucking complete that shit? You know, if I make it under 200, can, you know, not have to have a permit and I can do that for about $3,000. And I'm like getting excited. I'm like, and I can put a fucking rv over here. And I can put a pizza oven over here and I can do this and this and this and this and like the fucking, you know, the total cost of this shit's like racking up and it's above like $10,000 at this point. But I'm like, oh, man, this would be fucking great that way, you know, if I have someone that, you know, wants to come stay over here, you know, for, you know, amount of time, you know, cuz I have like a bunch of cousins, like getting into college or whatever, you know, and I'm sure I'm gonna have like, you know, the next generation of fucking people. It's like, cool, yeah, you can come fucking stay over here. But you know, like, I, I look at it like that, I'm like, how cool would it be to be ready for the fucking future to actually have shit instead of spending all your fucking money on Doordash and Grubhub and Uber eats? Yeah, it's like, oh, cool, I can fucking, you know, save up a few of those and fucking go get myself an rv. And right now is the perfect time to get an rv. It's a fucking buyer's market. I can go get a half decent rv, a little 22 foot rv for like $3,000, you know, get a u haul, fucking bring it over here and then get a little dolly, like a battery powered dolly to fucking move it exactly where I want it. [00:22:22] Speaker B: Babe. [00:22:23] Speaker A: What? [00:22:23] Speaker B: It's okay that your Maserati is an rv? I still get to laugh at it. [00:22:29] Speaker A: No, that's not it at all. And I've never wanted a Maserati. [00:22:38] Speaker B: I mean, who does? Honestly, fucking does anybody really want a Maserati? Kourt, do you want a Maserati? [00:22:46] Speaker A: She's not black. [00:22:48] Speaker B: Wait, so I'm not allowed to like a Maserati if I'm not black? [00:22:52] Speaker A: That's. It's like Lambos too. [00:22:55] Speaker B: What the fuck is the difference? [00:22:57] Speaker A: They're different fucking vehicles altogether. [00:23:00] Speaker B: But they're just flatter, right? And they have like, that m humps in the back and that's what makes him cool. [00:23:06] Speaker A: Well, Lamborghini was originally a tractor company. And fucking Lamborghini, they moved up in life. [00:23:15] Speaker B: Fuck yeah. [00:23:17] Speaker A: No, no, he went over to Ferrari and he's like, hey, you know, I want a Ferrari or something like that. He's like, fuck you. He's like, fine, I'll just make a better one than you. And he did. It's like a. You know, that that's a lesson to learn. Rich people be nice to people that you think are poor because they might just make something bigger and better than you ever could. [00:23:39] Speaker B: So who makes the Maserati? [00:23:43] Speaker A: Maserati makes Maserati. [00:23:45] Speaker B: So it's his own company? [00:23:47] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:23:48] Speaker B: I don't know a lot about cars, okay? [00:23:52] Speaker A: I'm sure it's like some other fucking company. Like Toyota makes Maserati. [00:23:56] Speaker B: But, like, sometimes card names mean company names, and sometimes company mains name card names, and it's difficult for me to differentiate. [00:24:13] Speaker A: Yeah. Fucking 2007 Maserati is $20,000, but a 2023 Maserati Mc. 20 quarter million dollars. But, yeah, no, it's its own fucking, like, trident fucking car company. Who owns Maserati? [00:24:36] Speaker B: According to Scottsdale, Maserati. Now that you know where Maserati is made, you may be wondering who owns the company. Maserati is owned by stellantisler Automobiles. [00:24:51] Speaker A: Cool. So it's a bunch of fucking foreign companies. Yeah. Like, honestly, I would never spend a quarter million dollars on a vehicle. [00:24:58] Speaker B: Maserati is a co op. [00:25:00] Speaker A: They're all co ops. Everything is a co op. Fucking co op. Again, a cooperative where fucking two fucking companies, you know, own the same shit. It's like nestle owning, like, most of everything that is. [00:25:15] Speaker B: Okay. So when I hear co op, I see it as a group of individuals owning the company together by. [00:25:22] Speaker A: No one person likes. No, that's not at all how it works. Yeah. Like a co op, you know, like when you see, like, you know, basin co op or fucking, you know, Del Norte co op or what? Any of these other fucking co ops, you know? Yes. Fucking all the members of the co op, technically, you know, own it. And, you know, some of them put in time and work there, whatever. You know, they can work, but it doesn't. It's like, hey, you're a fucking member here. It's like, imagine if you, you know, got, like, a membership at, like, Costco and, like, they gave you, you know, ownership of the company. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So. But, yeah, no, we're. We're never gonna own a Maserati. [00:26:15] Speaker B: Well, yeah, I'll crash it immediately. [00:26:19] Speaker A: Oh, you'd never drive it. [00:26:21] Speaker B: Exactly. I'd walk by it. It would instantly crash into something. [00:26:25] Speaker A: See, like, I want to fucking get, you know, like a freightliner or, like a Peter. I don't even think Peterbilt makes a bus. Now if I fucking find out. Cause that, like, if Peterbilt makes buses, I want one. Peterbilt bus. Oh, they do? Holy shit. Well, not really. [00:26:48] Speaker B: Eyebrows. [00:27:01] Speaker A: Pegasus bus introduces atlas models using Peterbilt chassis. [00:27:06] Speaker B: Pegasus. [00:27:08] Speaker A: It's just a bus company. [00:27:11] Speaker B: Wait, it's Pegasus. Greek or Latin? [00:27:14] Speaker A: I don't fucking know. [00:27:15] Speaker B: It's greek. So it's. It's not Pegasi. Oh, God. [00:27:21] Speaker A: But they what? How are we annoying? She's annoying. I'm just going off on fucking tangents right now. Before I get into the news, because I don't have that many news stories. Let's jump into the news because. Are you high right now, Courtney? [00:27:41] Speaker B: I wish. I'm just tired. I just have to do stuff after this. [00:27:47] Speaker A: Scientists push a new paragraph of animal consciousness saying insects may be sentient. No, they're not. I so pretty much scientists are coming out and saying fucking insects might have a consciousness. [00:28:01] Speaker B: They do have consciousness. [00:28:02] Speaker A: No, they don't. None of them do. [00:28:06] Speaker B: What do you define as conscious thought? [00:28:09] Speaker A: Fucking anything above. You know, I want to fuck, I want to eat, I want to sleep, I want to die. Like, if you have more than those four fucking thoughts. Consciousness. [00:28:22] Speaker B: Interesting. Continue. [00:28:24] Speaker A: It's fucking brilliant. [00:28:25] Speaker B: Right, um, so how have they supposedly proved that? [00:28:30] Speaker A: Well, that's what I'm reading. [00:28:33] Speaker B: Everything has consciousness. [00:28:35] Speaker A: Nearly 40 researchers signed the New York Declaration on Animal Consciousness, which at first was presented at a conference in New York University on Friday morning, marks a pivotal moment as a flood of research on animal cognition collides and debates on how various species ought to be treated. Treat them all the fucking same. It's fine now. [00:28:59] Speaker B: This is good and cool. This is science helping. [00:29:01] Speaker A: The declaration says that there is strong scientific support that birds and mammals have conscious experience and a realistic probability of consciousness for all vertebrates, including reptiles, amphibians, and fish. That possibly extends to many creatures without backbones. It adds such as insects, decapod crustaceans, including crabs and lobsters, cephalopod molluscs like squids and octopus and cuttlefish. [00:29:32] Speaker B: Anything above a sponge, I consider to be sentient. [00:29:38] Speaker A: While there is a realistic probability of consciousness experience in animals, it is irresponsible to ignore the possibility and decisions affecting that animal. We should consider the welfare risks and use evidence to inform our responses to these risks. So essentially, they want to fucking give, you know, all these animals rights. This is the fucking woke culture going way too fucking far. [00:30:02] Speaker B: This is a scientific study. This is. Oh, my God. [00:30:05] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. But they'll take the scientific study and be like, well, now fucking octopuses have consciousnesses, so you have to let them out into the ocean. [00:30:14] Speaker B: Everyone already knows octopuses consciousness. [00:30:18] Speaker A: It doesn't. It wants to eat, sleep, fuck and die like fucking that gorilla that Robin Williams met. [00:30:32] Speaker B: The actor? [00:30:33] Speaker A: Yeah, the actor. There's, like, a coco the gorilla. Like, new sign language and shit. [00:30:40] Speaker B: Uh huh. [00:30:40] Speaker A: It's very smart consciousness. It was sad that Robin Williams died. Would an octopus be sad if you died? No, not at all. [00:30:51] Speaker B: Okay. An octopus will not feel sympathy towards you, but it will feel sympathy towards another member of its own species. And that implies empathy. [00:31:00] Speaker A: Dogs. Yeah, they have consciousness. Cats. Yes. They have a consciousness because they can be sad. You know, something other than eating, sleeping, fucking, and dying. [00:31:14] Speaker B: Multiple animals have shown signs of grieving after the passing of a member of their group. [00:31:20] Speaker A: Yeah. But have insects. Never once has an insect been like, I'm gonna cry a little. Fly to your. [00:31:28] Speaker B: They haven't done studying, which is why they are proposing this as a declaration. [00:31:33] Speaker A: So. Yep. Hopefully this doesn't fucking take off. Up next, parents of olympians will be given heart monitors at the games this summer. There's. There's no dearth of entertainment to be had at the Olympics. Blah, blah, blah, blah. I just imagine them. They're like, hey, you guys are all old as shit, and you're gonna get too excited when your son wins or loses. Oh, they wanna show the parents excitement. [00:32:13] Speaker B: Yeah. What else would it be for? [00:32:15] Speaker A: So they don't die. [00:32:17] Speaker B: No. [00:32:18] Speaker A: Yeah. So they're pretty much taking. [00:32:21] Speaker B: This is cool as fuck. [00:32:23] Speaker A: I thought they're just, like, making sure the parents don't get too excited and have a stroke. So, yeah, now they're taking. They're giving all the parents a fucking heart monitor to see how fucking excited they are for their kid. Oh, my God, your parents are so excited. Look at their heart rate. Zero. Oh, no. [00:32:42] Speaker B: Tapping into empathy has been a very modern, current trend on social media, and they are. If you excuse. Excuse me. Tapping into this. [00:32:51] Speaker A: Me? [00:32:52] Speaker B: Well, this has become very popular on social media. [00:32:57] Speaker A: Talking. Talking about empathy. John Wayne Bobbitt. I don't know if you remember this dude. He's the one that his wife cut off his penis and threw it into a field, and then he found the penis that got thrown into the field, and they reattached it, and he did porn afterwards. [00:33:18] Speaker B: Even worse. Porn part, no. But the fact that it got reattached. [00:33:22] Speaker A: Is retouched, and it looks fine. There's, like, a scar. Oh, yeah, there's porn of it. [00:33:27] Speaker B: Okay, well, I want to see a picture of his dick. [00:33:30] Speaker A: Fine. [00:33:31] Speaker B: That's the important bit. I want to see if there's. [00:33:33] Speaker A: We literally watched the porn on this podcast. [00:33:36] Speaker B: Pull it up. [00:33:36] Speaker A: John Wayne Bobbitt's penis. So, like, that's his penis after it was cut off. It was just, like, the tip. Let's see John Wayne Bobbitt's penis reattached. Just give me the fucking image of it. [00:34:11] Speaker B: There are surgical videos. [00:34:13] Speaker A: I'm sure there is. [00:34:14] Speaker B: Oh, my God. [00:34:15] Speaker A: There's his fucking, you know, franken penis. You know, John Wayne Bobbitt uncut. [00:34:34] Speaker B: Okay, we need to watch this. [00:34:37] Speaker A: We literally watch, like, the entire fucking porn. Like, you know, he just, like, has a scar, like, you know, kind of, like, halfway through. It's not, like, too fucking crazy. [00:34:48] Speaker B: I want to see the scar. [00:34:50] Speaker A: John Wayne Bobbitt's porn. God fucking damn it. [00:34:56] Speaker B: I like how Google, like, starred out the word porn. [00:35:03] Speaker A: Of course it did. I don't know why it would. There. There's his penis. [00:35:11] Speaker B: Okay, can you enlarge it? [00:35:15] Speaker A: Enter. [00:35:16] Speaker B: Yes. We are 18 or older. [00:35:22] Speaker A: I don't imagine Courtney wants to see. [00:35:24] Speaker B: Oh, my God. This is old ass. [00:35:26] Speaker A: Yeah, it's an old ass fucking porn. [00:35:28] Speaker B: I burn everything. Yeah, this is good porn. [00:35:32] Speaker A: Let me fucking. Let me fucking get it for you. [00:35:37] Speaker B: This is a good, stout porn. [00:35:41] Speaker A: Starring John Wayne Bobbitt. [00:35:43] Speaker B: Ah. [00:35:51] Speaker A: Yeah, there's his penis. You can see a little scar there. [00:35:56] Speaker B: Wow. Kind of just looks like a Ron something or what do you do? [00:36:02] Speaker A: No, his wife cut his penis off. [00:36:04] Speaker B: For a good reason. Oh, my God. [00:36:10] Speaker A: You can just see, like, just a little scar. [00:36:12] Speaker B: It's all punchy around the scar. That's hilarious. [00:36:18] Speaker A: I love how he's soft while the nurse is sucking his dick. [00:36:21] Speaker B: Oh, my God. That's always the worst when it's, like they're doing their part and the dick is not. It's like, ugh, come on. Poor dude. [00:36:29] Speaker A: You can tell she's just not into it at all. [00:36:32] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, no, totes. [00:36:33] Speaker A: She's just, like, tries, like, just get wet. Yeah. [00:36:39] Speaker B: Deciding what she's going to pick up from the grocery store on the way home. [00:36:43] Speaker A: Oh, like that. That's cool. This fucking, like, gives me, like, you know, scenes. [00:36:47] Speaker B: Oh, my God. It's like. It's kind of like that lava lamp shape. Now. We're kind of, like, bulges in the middle and then goes back up to being narrow. [00:36:56] Speaker A: But are you happy with seeing John Wayne Bobbitt's penis? [00:36:59] Speaker B: I am very happy with seeing the scar. This is the best thing ever. This is the best thing on the podcast so far. [00:37:06] Speaker A: There you go. John Wayne Bobbitt's penis. If you want to fucking look it up, it's on Spank bank. Spank bang.com. Of course not. But, yeah, so John Wayne Bobbitt, you know, got his peanuts chopped off. You know, the whole background, like, he's alive. [00:37:28] Speaker B: He's alive. [00:37:29] Speaker A: He's alive. Yes. [00:37:31] Speaker B: Oh, my God. [00:37:32] Speaker A: Yeah, fucking. He got his penis fucking cut off, like, 30 years ago. He was young. He was, like, 20. He's, like, 50 now. He's a dad's age. [00:37:42] Speaker B: Wait, he was a teenager when it happened. [00:37:44] Speaker A: He was, like, 20. [00:37:45] Speaker B: Okay, so still teenager, technically. [00:37:49] Speaker A: Um, let me see. How old is John Wayne Bobbitt? Oh, 57 years old. [00:37:57] Speaker B: Good God. Yeah. [00:37:58] Speaker A: He's not even that fucking old. Yeah, he's. [00:38:00] Speaker B: What do you mean? He's not even that fucking old? [00:38:03] Speaker A: He's not even that fucking old. [00:38:05] Speaker B: He's old as shit, but he's bald. He's got, like, this sad, like, leprechaun like, beard going on. Yeah, it's not a good look. It's not a good look. I'm sorry. [00:38:24] Speaker A: But. So John Wayne Bobbitt fucking lost all of his toes due to fucking toxic water at Camp Lejeune. I don't even know where the fuck that is. I assume it's in fucking Florida. Um, let's see. Nope, it's in North Carolina. So, yeah, he's in North Carolina. There are some fucking bacteria in the water, and he lost all his fucking toes. [00:38:56] Speaker B: Okay. Besides the alligator, the Everglades, is there any difference between Florida and any of the northeast coasts, starting with New Jersey going down? [00:39:07] Speaker A: Yeah, there's a bunch of differences. [00:39:08] Speaker B: Like what temperature? [00:39:11] Speaker A: Fucking Florida's full of a bunch of old swingers. Georgia's full of a bunch of fucking black people. And it goes from there. [00:39:22] Speaker B: They all get hurricanes. [00:39:24] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, there is a lot of them. So, yeah, fucking, you know, he lost his penis. Got it reattached. Lost all his toes. I don't think they're coming back. Sorry, bud. Onto the next story, because we got to keep it moving. Wrong coupled. Gets divorced after solicitor clicks wrong button. [00:39:46] Speaker B: Oh, my God. [00:39:49] Speaker A: A London law firm admits to the error, but judge says it's final and order cannot be overturned. So apparently there is a couple. Mister and misses Williams. You know, fucking generic London name. They are married for 21 years until they are separated in 2023. Solicitors at the London firm VAR Das, headed by Alicia Aisha Vard Vardas. [00:40:25] Speaker B: Last name is owner. [00:40:27] Speaker A: Yeah. The self styled diva of divorce Jesus used a portal to mistakenly apply the final order for the couple who were still attempting to agree to financial arrangements for their split. [00:40:44] Speaker B: Oh, so they were in the process of getting divorced. [00:40:55] Speaker A: But Sir Andrew McFarlane. Andy McFarlane, the president of the family division, explained the lawyers had intended to apply for a divorce for another client, but inadvertently opened the electronic case in a Williams versus Williams and proceeded to apply for a final order in that case. So apparently, he said the online system operated with its now customary speed and granted the order, divorcing the Williams's within 21 minutes. So weird and stupid sometimes. So, yeah, there is another Williams case, and fucking, they're like, whoops. And just fucking divorced those people. I don't know why the fucking London government's way quicker than us government, but it's like, yeah, here you go. You're fucking divorced now. And I like to imagine that those people were like, super, like, happy, and they're like, sorry, this isn't your wife. What do you mean it's not my wife? You've been divorced. What? When? How? [00:42:17] Speaker B: It just really depends. I mean, there are certain ways that. To make going, getting the divorce faster. [00:42:31] Speaker A: Well, I mean, I assume, like, the wife loved it because she's like, we get to get married again. [00:42:39] Speaker B: It said they were in the process of getting divorced as well. [00:42:48] Speaker A: Well, no, there's a. I'm pretty sure there's a different Williams family. Doesn't matter. So, yeah, today I learned you can. [00:42:55] Speaker B: Know if you guys wanted to get a divorce, you guys have to be. You have to wait six months. [00:43:01] Speaker A: Yeah, now I'm all good on that. [00:43:04] Speaker B: Yeah, no, fuck that noise. It's too much work. Either way, I might as well stick with what I've got. [00:43:10] Speaker A: Um, last story of the night. Student missing out on prom after bringing bag of chips to school. Montgomery county. Um, a local high school student will miss out on her senior prom after getting suspended over bringing a bag of corn chips to school, as reported on newscenter seven at 05:00. Miami Valley Career Technology center prohibits bringing this kind of snack to school because a teacher is severely allergic to an ingredient. Hey, teachers, if you're severely allergic, just pick a different fucking profession. I know you want to help the kids, and I'll get something different. Bring an Epipen. Do Amber. Guy's daughter Allie is a senior, so. Allie Guy. Oh, that's a terrible name. Is a senior at Miami Valley Career Technology center set to graduate in December? That's early. [00:44:20] Speaker B: I don't know when high schoolers graduate. [00:44:23] Speaker A: June. Her hometown is in West Carrollton. Guy said someone gave Allie the talkie chips on the school bus, and she was hungry, so she ate them. Allie didn't finish the chips. Guy said Allie brought the bag inside the building, but there are only two chips left when she finished the remaining chips. Allie threw the bag of chips away and went to class. The school principal called her down to the office and at that point asked if she had ate the chips. She said yes, and then they suspended her for five days. [00:44:57] Speaker B: What the fuck? [00:44:58] Speaker A: Due to the suspension at the Miami Valley Career Technology Center. Guy said it's West Carlton's policy. Did not allow her to attend the prom either. [00:45:09] Speaker B: What the fuck? [00:45:11] Speaker A: For her, it was a big deal. She probably tried on 50 dresses before she picked the right dress. It's probably her only problem she'd be able to get to before she graduates in December. They're taking away a one in a lifetime, once in a lifetime opportunity for her. And then schools wonder why they get shot up. [00:45:27] Speaker B: You get to go princess dress shopping for so many things in your life. [00:45:33] Speaker A: It's like, shame. How about just this? Go fucking kill that teacher. The fucking problem solves itself. Throw a fucking hot dog or throw a corn dog in his face. Fuck you. God wants you dead. [00:45:45] Speaker B: So what are they allergic to corn? That's the weirdest thing ever. Yeah, fight. Like, what I don't even understand is a punishment. Like, that seems kind of overboard. Like, it is overboard. [00:46:05] Speaker A: It's like saying, you can't have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. [00:46:08] Speaker B: Shouldn't be in that profession. [00:46:10] Speaker A: Yeah, that's exactly what I started this whole thing out with. You know, get the fuck out of the profession if you cannot fucking, you know, be around it. It's like, if you're allergic to fucking, you know, anything, you cannot work in a kitchen yet. People will be like, I'm allergic to fucking dairy. And then they'll work in a kitchen. Big, why did this happen to me? Go fucking work, you know, in Alaska or some shit. Go work in some. Your remote area where you control everything. Go do some remote work. What? [00:46:44] Speaker B: I work in the medical field and I'm allergic to latex. [00:46:49] Speaker A: Yeah, and then you fucking work around it. If someone accidentally touches you with their latex glow, you're not like, well, we can't have any latex in the building because I'm allergic to it. [00:46:59] Speaker B: Yeah, I don't make a big deal. As long as it's just a rash, nothing more. I don't make a big deal of it. But if it gets worse, then I have to. I have to get workers comp for it, and I can't hide it. [00:47:12] Speaker A: Yeah, how about this? You fucking, you know, quarantine the fucking trouble. You quarantine the fucking dorks inside their own area. And it's like, hey, you have to stay in this fucking area. And whoever fucking snitched on this girl, you're a bitch. You should get the shit beaten out of you. [00:47:31] Speaker B: Yeah, snitches, too. Good. Snitches like you. [00:47:35] Speaker A: Yeah, you should fucking get stomped the fuck out. And this teacher should die, too. [00:47:42] Speaker B: Wait, so. So it's banned totally from the school? [00:47:45] Speaker A: Yeah, banned totally from the school. [00:47:49] Speaker B: That just seems so stupid. Yeah. [00:47:59] Speaker A: So, yeah, now lawyers are gonna get involved. The fucking school is gonna lose even more money over this whole fucking thing, and then someone's gonna find some. Like, all the girl has to do is say, this teacher touched me. The guy's gone. He's fucking gone. That's it. That's all she has to do. This teacher touched me like that. It's a fucked up thing to do. But it's like, you know, hey, guess what? Now your fucking career's gone because you wanted to fuck around and find out. I hate fucking people like this. If you're allergic to something, stay away from it. I'm allergic to getting shot in the fucking head. I don't go to areas where I get shot in the fucking head. [00:48:42] Speaker B: So for people who have the need for epi pens, every time they get an exposure, it increases the effect of their reaction. Every single exposure makes it more deadly to them. Yeah, which is why this can be an issue. But also, I agree with you. That person should be taking better cautions than a kid having fucking snacks. [00:49:05] Speaker A: You know, I fucking, you know, go to Durango all the time. And I have a few friends. I have one that's allergic to strawberries. I have one that's allergic to fucking dairy severely. And gluten, you know, and read 40 food die. I have, you know, friends that are allergic all that shit. They know what they're allergic to. They stay away from it. You know, just because you have a corn chip doesn't mean it's gonna spread in the air and fucking find you and go attack you. That's not how fucking food allergens work. And if you are that fucking severely allergic to where if a fucking empty bag of chips is gonna fucking kill you in the room over, you do not get to be outside. Just go fucking die in a corner. Please go fucking die in a corner. We don't need you on earth. We don't need your pussy ass fucking muddying up the jeans. [00:50:02] Speaker B: Did you go to prom? [00:50:03] Speaker A: No. [00:50:04] Speaker B: Courtney, did you go to prom? Yeah. Was it fun? Yeah. [00:50:10] Speaker A: I mean, I went to a fucking couple of school dances. They're lame as fuck. But still, it's something that this girl was looking forward to. And it's like, hey, guess what? You know, you fucking fucked up something for, you know, this girl, she's gonna fucking take it the fuck out on you. Get ready for fucking how to dance. [00:50:28] Speaker B: It's so odd. What did they expect them to do? [00:50:30] Speaker A: Get ready for retribution, teacher, your fucking life is over. Watch your back for the rest of your fucking life. If this was my daughter, I'd fucking go kill that teacher and the principal. Fuck it. Okay, here you go. Bang, bang. There. Now you're all dead. This is why I don't have kids. Because I'd be wildly overprotective of them. And if someone, you know, is like, oh, my kid made a fucking mistake, or I just, you know, find every opportunity to snitch on him, I would find a way to fucking sneak meth inside the principal's car and have him fucking, like, just sent to prison forever. [00:51:17] Speaker B: If I had a kid, I keep it on elation harness in public for as long as I could possibly do so. [00:51:23] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, if. If you're a full grown adult and you know what you're allergic to, just stay away from it. Simple. You know, if that girl came in and fucking like, hey, mister teacher, you're allergic to these, and fucking wiped him in his face, then, yeah, fucking suspend that bitch for five days and take away fucking prom. But she came into the building and threw away a fucking empty bag of chips. Suck a dick. Quit fucking punishing fucking people. This is why fucking, you know, bad things happen. Welcome to America. Yeah, this is where serial killers fucking get their start. This is like the fucking, you know, first episode and fucking, you know, any crime show. [00:52:06] Speaker B: If you found out I was a serial killer, would you still love me? [00:52:09] Speaker A: Depends on why you were a serial killer. [00:52:12] Speaker B: The why matters. [00:52:13] Speaker A: Yeah, the why matters a lot. [00:52:15] Speaker B: So what if I just hurt certain people because I wanted to eat them after they were dead? [00:52:21] Speaker A: I would be like, no, no, but if you're like, anymore. But if you're like, I kill these people because they drive slow in the fast lane. Or I kill these people because they're pedophiles. Or I kill these people because they're rapists. Or I kill these people, you know. [00:52:35] Speaker B: For cause behind me killing people, I just want to eat people that look attractive. [00:52:42] Speaker A: Yeah, no, I don't think I can, you know, vibe with that. Sorry. [00:52:46] Speaker B: Hmm. Weird. Alex. [00:52:50] Speaker A: Yeah, you are. [00:52:51] Speaker B: Um, there's nothing wrong with wanting to be a cannibal. I will not feel ashamed for my desire to eat human flesh. Oh, my God. [00:53:04] Speaker A: All right, so let's. Let's get into some relationship advice. This one's by throwaway. My fiance, 23, female, wants to call off our wedding because I, 26, male, would save my three year old niece before her dogs in a hypothetical fire. How can I explain to her my reasoning? I recently got engaged to my fiance about two months ago. Boo. Everything was fine until two days ago. She has two dogs and a cat. She loves them and essentially sees them as her fur babies. I like them, too. I like pets in general, but not to the extent of calling them my kids or anything like that. I personally find it ridiculous, but it's harmless, so whatever. My sister has a three year old who literally adores me. She was always so excited to see me, and I get her gifts from time to time. My sister and her husband were going to an event, and they left her with me and my fiance for a few hours. She, I, and my fiance. That's not how you do that. We're watching a movie. We're watching imovie, and the subject of fire rescue comes up for some awkward reason. She asked me, if there's a fire, who would I save first, her, my niece or her dogs? I told her I'd fuck. I do my best to save the two of them, her and my niece, and I put my own life at risk to save them. She said, what about the dogs? I told them I would try and save them, but her and my niece come first. It's not even close. She got mad and started saying, I'm putting my niece above my own family. I told her, I don't know what our logic is, but there's no way I'd put the dogs as much as I like them above my niece, a little human being who who I share 25% of my DNA with. She then started saying, I know how much that I know how much her dogs mean to her. And then if I loved her, I would value them as much as I value her. I told her I value her a lot more than she could imagine. But when it comes to saving my niece or the dogs, there is no ambiguity. It's always going to be my niece. She even mentioned how I should save the dogs before her. I told her the only other being I would put before her is our child when we have one. Otherwise, I would always save her before her pets. She's been giving me a hard time in acting different with the dogs. I used to feed the dogs every morning, but now she rushes to do it, so I don't do it. She takes them on, walks by herself without telling me and is essentially trying to take me out of the equation when it comes to the dogs. I talked to her about it yesterday, and she says she's not sure she wants to marry me anymore because I don't value her fur babies. [00:56:04] Speaker B: This bitch is crazy. [00:56:06] Speaker A: Oh, man, you got fucking let off easy. Break up with her, dude. [00:56:10] Speaker B: That's crazy. Okay. As a person in a veterinary field, in this kind of situation, you should always rescue you the human, over the pet. Like, that's our stance in the veterinary field, is human life. And at the end of the day, comes over animal life, what you do. [00:56:30] Speaker A: Is you give her something equally ridiculous. You know, just come up. [00:56:34] Speaker B: This bitch is crazy. [00:56:36] Speaker A: No, no, just be like, hey, babe, so if there was a fire, would you save me or my ps five first? It's like, of course I'd save you. Not my ps five. You should always save my ps five first. Like, even if I die, my ps five gets to live. And then she's like, oh, that's ridiculous. It's like, so is saving your fucking dogs. [00:57:01] Speaker B: This bitch is crazy. Yeah. Like, he is saving himself from. [00:57:07] Speaker A: I understand, you know, loving your cat. Like, I enjoy my cat, wherever the fuck it is. Um, she's probably up in her little cubby. [00:57:16] Speaker B: She's in her new cubby that her daddy made for her. [00:57:19] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, I didn't fucking give birth to her like that. That'd be horrifying. If you're, like, in the fucking delivery room, you're like, it is a baby cat. [00:57:34] Speaker B: Someone's daddy's little princess. [00:57:38] Speaker A: You actually see her up there? [00:57:40] Speaker B: Mm hmm. [00:57:42] Speaker A: No, I mean, like, I like my cat, and I'll fucking do, you know, nice things for her. But if there's, like, a fire, I mean, like, I'll open the door, I'm like, get out. There's a fire. And if she can't figure it out from there, then I'm like, ah, shit, she died. Darwin award for that one. I'd save my computer over my cat. Like. Like that. That's. That seems evil. Like, on the fucking surface, that seems evil. Saving my computer over my cat. [00:58:13] Speaker B: You're allowed to have your own priorities. [00:58:15] Speaker A: I'd say my guns, my computer, my ps five, and then maybe my cat, then you, and then maybe your cats. [00:58:39] Speaker B: I want to die with my cats. [00:58:43] Speaker A: Hmm. [00:58:44] Speaker B: So, Alex, by the time you've gotten everything that you wanted, Alex will have gotten her wish. [00:58:51] Speaker A: She's like, the house is like, already on fire. I'm like kicking through walls. I gotta save my guns. The bullets are going off in the guns. [00:59:00] Speaker B: No, it doesn't really go off, does it? [00:59:04] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. I've met several people with glass eyes because they decided to throw 22s into a fire. It is a hundred percent a thing that happens. I want comments on this. [00:59:22] Speaker B: Yes, I want to hear everyone. [00:59:24] Speaker A: She's not mature enough to get married. I don't think she's mature enough for a house plan ahead. My concern is she'd rescue her dogs before me. [00:59:37] Speaker B: She's crazy. [00:59:39] Speaker A: She's doing you a massive favor. Letter. [00:59:42] Speaker B: Yes. [00:59:44] Speaker A: The fact that she wants to break up with you over an unlikely hypothetical situation means she is not mature enough to get married. And probably you two, for that matter. [00:59:53] Speaker B: Yep. [00:59:53] Speaker A: If you interviewed every person you met for the next 20 years, you'd probably never meet a single one who had decided to save a pet over a human. But this is a reason for both of you to dig in your heels and blow your relationship over it. Okay, maybe it's not a maturity thing. Maybe has more to do with a hypothetical fire. I mean, you know, she is 23 and you are 26. They're still babies, little babies. And getting married at that young of an age is a dumb thing to do. [01:00:24] Speaker B: 50 50. [01:00:27] Speaker A: I don't know how long you've been fucking in a relationship, but I assume it's like a year or something stupid like that. [01:00:35] Speaker B: Hopefully at least that long before getting engaged. [01:00:38] Speaker A: People these days are dumb as fucking. Yeah, so, opie. Sorry. Fucking either, you know, sit down and have a real fucking heart to heart with her, or, you know, sit down and break her heart for her. I mean. [01:00:56] Speaker B: Yeah, so weird. This bitch is crazy. [01:01:03] Speaker A: Here's another crazy one. That's from two hot takes. Edit I am not a door. Or this is by a little London 696. Edit I am not a doormat. I find it rather cruel. A few of you had said that. I agree. I agreed on our children's names before they were born. I need advice on how to handle it without breaking his heart and being respectful and tactic and tactful, but also showing them this isn't a good idea. Also, I did love his mother. My partner lost his mother in March. Suddenly she took her breathing tube out of her nose to blow it. Probably because she was half asleep and forgot to put it back and she drifted away. That sucks. When she was found, it was too late. It was peaceful and honestly, the way I'd want to go. With nothing but peace and comfort. I found out. I was pregnant. Seven months prior, we had a name picked out. After her passing, he decided to take it upon himself to change our child's name to her name. You know when a person gives a name. You know when a person's name gives such a bad taste in your mouth? That's what she did to this name. She wasn't a horrible person, per se, but she wasn't the best. She had her moments where she was the most wonderful, but most of the time, and please don't take this the wrong way, I hate to talk about the dead, but she was a monster in law. She wouldn't take care of herself. She would get taken to the hospital to get attention from her children, get back in good health, and get sent home when things return to normal. And the attention would suffice, and she would do it all over again. She needed her children's sole attention always. She needed to feel important, wanted, and needed. And it made me feel honest. It made me feel bad and honestly broke my heart that she felt she needed to do all this to get attention. Now she is gone. As much as I love her and miss her, and believe me, I do, I do not want that name associated with our child. I don't want to think about it every time I talk to our child. I don't want the stigma I have towards that name to be forced on our child. We have actually argued over it. I've tried to compromise by making it a middle name. I've tried to add a name to it. So it's one whole name, but he won't budge. I've told him we have a name already. He won't budge. I'm at a point where I want to leave him, and it's being forced into me, and I don't want it. I want our child to have a name that has nothing to do with anyone we know. Our son has his stepdad's name as a middle name. Our daughter has his grandma's name as a middle name, and our oldest has his stepdad's mother's name as, oh, hey, mo. As a first name, I want this child to have something simplistic and beautiful. I don't want to be reminded of someone that was so toxic to herself and ate away at others. Can someone give me advice on what to do, please? I'm at a loss. Honestly, I don't want to do this with him anymore because how he's acting. I caved with every other child, but I cannot and will not cave. I love the name that's already chosen. Keep the name. Dump the guy. [01:04:41] Speaker B: Oh, op, I'm sorry. I kind of adore that. It's. Oh. It's going to take so much energy to enforce this boundary. You've given way far too much. It's going to be rough. I wish you every good luck I have in my soul. May you persevere. You deserve to. Oh, my. [01:05:09] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, op, it truly does suck for you, but, you know, just pick. No. [01:05:20] Speaker B: Yeah. I don't mean to be mean to op, but op needs to understand the truth in front of her, and then she can be allowed to make a decision. I mean, decision is always hers, but it's better to have more information. [01:05:38] Speaker A: Well, she says she's not a doormat. [01:05:40] Speaker B: And people who say that are doormats. [01:05:44] Speaker A: Well, they can see where other people are coming from. [01:05:47] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:05:48] Speaker A: It's like you have multiple children with this man, and it's. It's really not in your best interest to leave them. And you got to realize that your husband is grieving, because as much as you didn't care for that woman, that woman was still his mother, still his mommy, even if you didn't, you know, enjoy her. [01:06:10] Speaker B: Exactly. So you agree op is a doormat? [01:06:13] Speaker A: No. [01:06:14] Speaker B: No. You're speaking from her partner's perspective, agreeing that she is a doormat. [01:06:18] Speaker A: Well, no. Her husband is fucking grieving at the death of, you know, his mother. [01:06:24] Speaker B: I know. [01:06:26] Speaker A: And so, you know, kind of like, give it more time and then just be like, you know, hey, it's this or nothing. And, mochi, get off my fucking keyboard. Get. Get. Or go back up there. Mochi, fuck off. Okay. But, yeah, this. It truly sucks for you, opie. If it was me and I was somehow pregnant, you know, seven months and was about to give birth in two months, just be like, hey, we're gonna put a pin in this. We already had a name. Fucking bicked out. We're not gonna give it your mom's name because your mom was kind of a bitch. [01:07:17] Speaker B: And families are difficult. [01:07:21] Speaker A: And if he's like, I don't want to do this, you know, right now, it's like, yeah, you can do the middle name. You know, you can call our daughter that. You know, you can call our daughter whatever the fuck you want, Darbit. But, you know, her legal name is going to be this. Just put your foot down. The worst that happens is that you get 100% custody of all the kids, and he loses everything. He loses his wife, his mom, and. [01:07:58] Speaker B: All his kids percentiles are against you. But I wish you good luck. [01:08:03] Speaker A: Yeah. Hopefully he gets over his grieving phase and it's like, you know, okay, yeah, that was silly. I'm sorry. And you have a big, long fucking marriage and you never have to deal with a divorce lawyer, but that is it. Yeah, we're out of time. Anyway, DMI, the asshole was, am I the asshole for not telling my brother about my mom's, about our mom's death because he didn't answer the phone? [01:08:41] Speaker B: So grief is never this one now. Predictable. [01:08:44] Speaker A: And. Just read it. Just. It's on. Am I the asshole? It's like near the top of 6 hours ago. Okay, I'll read it after the fucking podcast. [01:08:56] Speaker B: Okay. [01:08:57] Speaker A: That way, you know, the podcast doesn't go too long. But thank you all so much for being here. Thank you all so much for listening. Sorry about last week being a fucking whole ass train wreck. That sucked. But we are back up on the horse after we fell off and got dragged fucking 100ft. [01:09:14] Speaker B: Yeah, beneath the sea. [01:09:16] Speaker A: You can follow me on Instagram, Twitter, and all that bullshit. Alex, a truck. I'm everywhere. Don't really post anything. Don't really give a shit. I might post my latest fucking clip up there because I think I did pretty good and I got a lot of fucking kudos for it. It's one that I did like four fucking times. And I did a little bit of the fucking next fucking set I'm gonna do at the top of this episode. So I might even fucking post that if that goes well. See, here's the thing with comedians. If our fucking set eats shit, we don't post it. We're just like, delete that. Gone forever. Goodbye. [01:09:59] Speaker B: Why? [01:10:01] Speaker A: Because it's awful. [01:10:02] Speaker B: No, the mistakes are important. [01:10:05] Speaker A: Like, we'll watch it, but we're not gonna fucking post it. [01:10:09] Speaker B: We're not gonna cool to watch someone evolve from, like, being. From starting. [01:10:14] Speaker A: So you want me to just, like, post, like, every fucking thing I have on, you know, my YouTube page and it's like, hey, here's every. [01:10:21] Speaker B: No. To watch people improve. [01:10:23] Speaker A: Here's every fucking set I've ever done. [01:10:25] Speaker B: Amazing. [01:10:26] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, like, I've seen people's first fucking sets. I've seen that a lot. And some of them are okay. None of them are like, holy shit, that's the funniest. Fuck you. You should be a millionaire with your first set. Holy fuck, never. So. But that's it. We'll see you all next week. Bye. [01:10:51] Speaker B: See ya.