Whipper Snapper's

[00:00:01] Speaker A: Alrighty. Alrighty, everybody. Welcome back to another week of the Human podcast. You're back in it. Oh, why do you do it? I'm your host, as always, Alex. The truck got my wife over here, not the truck. And we got Courtney from way over in California. [00:00:19] Speaker B: Yep. [00:00:20] Speaker A: No longer on fire, I don't think. Nope. [00:00:24] Speaker B: So in a few years, they're going to be moving closer to me. Maybe. [00:00:28] Speaker A: Maybe. Maybe so. You know, like, I. I keep up with, you know, political, which I, you know, try and keep off this podcast as much as I can. I. I try my best. You know, eventually I might, you know, just do, like, a fully political podcast, but a million people do it. Go listen to their podcast if you want to hear that. [00:00:53] Speaker B: But I used to have a little bit more. When you first did this podcast, you had a little bit of politics mixed in. So it has stopped, like, because it's you. [00:01:05] Speaker A: You live with your dad. So I'm like, you. You. You get enough of it. [00:01:10] Speaker B: Oh, thank you. Oh, my God. [00:01:12] Speaker A: That's. [00:01:12] Speaker B: No one knows. My dad's one of those people that watches Fox News all the time. So. [00:01:20] Speaker A: Yeah, so what she's saying is, like, me and her dad, you know, get along great because, like, we both, you know, we're both Republicans. Americans, sure, it's fine. But, you know, here in Colorado, our taxes are going up and they're, you know, looking for any way to raise our taxes and screw. Screw us over to line their pockets. So here in, like, four years, I'm going to, you know, give it a bit of time. I'm gonna fight like hell, you know, still testify in front of, you know, the House and the Senate here and do everything I can to, you know, do my part. And then, you know, if it fails, then I will look at buying land in another state. And if it doesn't, then I'll stay right here. If we win the battle, then, hell, yeah, I'm staying. But, you know, I don't want to leave. You know, that. That's for damn sure. But if. If you know it all, it all goes to. I might move to, like, Arizona, New Mexico, you know, something like that. Maybe Florida, maybe North Carolina. [00:02:34] Speaker B: Florida? You'd really move to Florida? [00:02:41] Speaker A: You know, the Jews, the ones that have money, you know, you can go befriend, like, a really old person that's about to die. And, you know, they. They'll be like, yeah, and you just like, you know, like, Trump is such a good guy. And it's like, yeah, he is. Here's all my money. It's like, just go scam old people. [00:03:03] Speaker C: Go. [00:03:07] Speaker A: It's like I can draw a picture of Trump on the back of your car. Oh, thank you. Here's a hundred dollars. Wait a minute. I don't have a car. But, you know, I, I, I think about it, you know, and if I can go out and buy, you know, 40 acres, 100 acres of land for a decent price with all the mineral and water rights, then hell, yeah, I mean, I, I'll take that up. What, what do you want? Mo. What? And then, you know, be able to put like a double wide on that thing and. Mo. Mochi. Can you stop? Stop it. What? What? Figure it, figure it out. Go do something else. Then hop up on your thing. Yeah, you keep on, you know, hitting buttons on my board either, you know, sit up here and be calm. Okay, There, there. Yeah. Be calm. Yeah. Okay. But, yeah, no, eventually I would like to just buy some land somewhere else, you know, if it all goes to out here in Colorado, so. But that's neither here nor there. That, that's gonna be in four years. I'm gonna give it a chance, but we got a few news stories and we'll try and, you know, keep this one a short episode. I keep on saying I'm like, I'm gonna do short episodes, and I never do it. So this week I'm gonna try. First news story. I'm trying to keep good news stories. Native American tribes in the west are trying and succeeding in getting ancestral lands back. You know, now, just like me, you know, I, I must be Native because I want my own land. Fucking nailed it. But Native American tribes across the west are getting their land back. It's called the Land Back Movement. Wow. Original Charles Bradley describes it as tribal communities and activists trying to reclaim and reacquire land that was historically and culturally theirs. Bradley is a freelance journalist and a former Indigenous affairs fellow at High County News and has a colleague. Recently, Chrono chronicled his efforts. But, you know, pretty much the whole this dude is, you know, going through and being a, you know, good dude for the Navajo Nation and, you know, helping them get their land back. I mean, they already have a whole bunch of land, but, you know, they can, they can use some more. You know, they, they, I, I, I do like the Navajos. They make good fry bread. Have you ever had fry bread before? [00:06:27] Speaker C: I do not think so. [00:06:27] Speaker A: Fry bread, Fry bread. Fry bread. Fried? No, no. Fry bread? [00:06:34] Speaker B: I don't know. No, I don't think so. What is it? [00:06:39] Speaker A: It's like a. Nah it's like a Navajo taco. Like, you know, when you, like, throw a tortilla on the heat and it, like, blows up? Like, it puffs up. Yeah, it's like that. Not entirely sure how they make it, but, you know, I have a few Navajo friends, and they'll be like, hey, I'm making fry bread, you know, and they'll, you know, charge, like, $4 for a fry bread taco. And I'm like, hell, yeah, give me a fry bread taco. Like, the natives know how to make some, like, good food for a good price. And they know how to, like, you know, shake me down for my money, too. Like, they'll. They'll see my truck, and then they'll come back. Yeah, give me this. And, you know, I'll give you breakfast. Mexicans, too. Like, if I see, like, a little Mexican lady, and. And she has, like, a little minivan, and she's like, I have burritos. I have breakfast burrito. I'm like, all right, how much? And she, like, $5. And she'll just, like. Just hand me, like, 3 pounds of burrito. It's crazy. I mean, it's nothing compared to the white guy that had tamales. Like. Like, I remember one day I was sitting at work, and a dude comes in with a fanny pack on in the front, and he's like, hey, I got tamales. Not tamales, tamales. I'm like, all right, how much? He's like, four for $20. I'm like, I'm curious as to what a white guy thinks tamales are, and I had $20 in my pocket to burn. So I hand him a $20 bill, and he pulls out what would be one tamale and hands it to me. I'm like, where are the other three? He's like, oh, no, that's four all wrapped up. And they were the size of cigars. Like, small cigars, like, four small c. I'm like, how dare you? I. I looked at him. I'm like, dude, I'm not being mean. This is trash. Never do this again. Never. And I. I. I opened one up, and it was just, you know, no meat in there. Just. I'm not even sure what was in there. I threw the other three away. It was so bad. I was very upset. I'm like, just get out of here. Take. Take your fucking 20. Get out of here. Throw the rest of that garbage you have there away. Those corn stalks, essentially. Just throw them in the garbage. It's fine. Take your $20. You have fucking made your Nut, you know, congratulations. You. He's like, you. I'm. I. I never saw him again after that. To his credit, I'm like, ah, but I'm sure you, like, went right to the next building, got tamales. Oh, my God. But that, that. That's where, you know, I. I like, you know, immigration into this country. Come in, bring your food. Absolutely. But, yeah, this guy is trying to get the Navajos back their land. You know, tribes in California have had some success, and it's pretty cool. Good. Good for them. And I'm very happy this is all going down. Yeah. [00:10:39] Speaker B: So, like, the. The rules that you propose, they haven't happened yet. Like, the earlier off, you mentioned that they're gonna rule make gas appliances. [00:10:56] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:10:57] Speaker B: Like, you trade them out, you won't be able to keep them at all, like, grandfathered in if you already have them. [00:11:02] Speaker A: So I. I believe it's later this year. Any new house being made cannot have any gas appliance whatsoever. And then they're, you know, aiming to remove all, you know, gas from everything. So everyone has to have a heat pump to, you know, run, you know, like, AC and heat throughout your house. You have to have an electric stove. You have to have an electric water heater. And, you know, like, we've ran the numbers. A bunch of smarter people than me have ran the numbers, and there is absolutely no way that we could produce enough electricity. And we are going to have brownouts throughout Colorado, kind of like how California does, you know, especially if there's a fire or high winds, they just turn off the electricity and like, oh, well, that's that. And it's like, if someone's relying on that electricity to survive and whatever, screw you. We don't care, [00:12:09] Speaker B: man. [00:12:09] Speaker A: Yep. This is why, you know, I'm like, do not do this. This is a bad thing. Yeah. I mean, we had a coal plant here in Colorado that was very efficient. They shut that thing down. Remember that coal plant? That big old plume of smoke in the middle of the city? [00:12:30] Speaker B: No. [00:12:31] Speaker A: We used to have a coal plant here in the middle of Colorado Springs. And it used to, you know, just shoot up a steep, you know, like a thing of smoke in the middle of the city. And not smoke, steam. And it was very clean burning and very, you know, efficient with the electricity. And, you know, the electricity bill would be like a hundred dollars a month, you know, if I went buck wild with it. And they got rid of that. Now it's, you know, way more expensive now. Now I'm looking at, you know, $300 for utilities and it's only going up, you know, if you live up in Denver, guess what, your utility bill just went up. And you know, in fact, like they sent me a text. Not too long ago saying, hey, you know, we have new electrical rates for you. If you use electricity during these times, your, you know, rate's gonna go up during like these normal times. And it sucks. Absolutely. I'm like, oh, this is, you know, the worst. Let's see. But you know, just dumbass. Every single day that I, you know, hate. Yeah, it's way far down. Yep. This is Colorado Springs utilities. Today your electric rates will switch to energy wise time of day rate. No action is needed. More information go to this website. And then you go to this website. You know, it's like, oh yeah, residential rate sheet. And yep, everything just went up in price. You know, water's, you know, definitely going to go up in price because we're, you know, going to be in the middle of a drought. But whatever, we'll see what happens. [00:14:53] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:14:54] Speaker A: But on to the next, you know, story. This is something that I think my wife would love. Scientists may have found a pill for sleep apnea. [00:15:05] Speaker B: Really? [00:15:06] Speaker A: Yep. A University of Gothenburg, a European clinical trial found that the drug sooth significantly reduced breathing interruptions in people with modern to severe sleep apnea. Patients taking higher doses experienced up to 47% fewer pauses than breath and improved oxygen levels during sleep. The drug helps stabilize breathing signals in the brain, reducing airway collapse. Scientists say the findings could pave the way for a pill based version to CPAP machines. [00:15:47] Speaker C: That's cool. Wow, that's really cool. There's nothing like tricking the body against itself. [00:15:56] Speaker B: Wow. [00:15:57] Speaker C: There's nothing quite like it. [00:15:59] Speaker A: I mean, I, I don't think I'll die. Many patients cannot tolerate CPAP treat treatment. It's like, yeah, you know, I, I, I roll too much in my sleep for a CPAP machine. And also I'm not going to pay for a CPAP machine. I'll pay a bunch of money for land. I won't pay any money for a cpap. And plus I'd have to like go to a doctor. And then they'd be like, okay, sleep in this bed where we watch you. I'm like, all right. And I'll have to like look at them like, is it all right if I like, you know, jerk off? That's how I get to sleep. [00:16:41] Speaker C: Like when I did my sleep study, like they make you, they have you, they have you like stay awake for like a really long time. So you're like actually legitimately sleepy when you get there. And so quite honestly, I passed out about an hour and a half into I thought I'd be awake the whole thing, be way too stressed out. Hour and a half in, I passed out. [00:16:59] Speaker A: I, I would stay awake just despite them. They're like, dude, you are insanely tired. And it's like, I know, but I'm not gonna fall asleep and I'll just die. I'll just die. I'm dead, you guys. But yeah, that'd be cool if like, I like take like my, you know, my sleep medicine. My, my brain is saying, take my tuberculosis pill. I don't know why. Take your tuberculosis pill. My melatonin pill. I don't even know why. It's not even close. [00:17:46] Speaker C: Your brain just had a perfect little misfire there. I'm just like, I loved that. [00:17:52] Speaker A: I'm like looking at science, the brain [00:17:55] Speaker C: can make a connection between those two words. [00:17:57] Speaker A: Yeah, tuberculosis. I'm like, like, that'd be a great fucking pill. Just like a, you know, take my tuberculosis pill, take my AIDS pill, you know, take my sleep pill and then take my sleep apnea pill. But yeah, no, I take melatonin to go to sleep and then just take like my, you know, don't die pill. I think that'd be pretty cool. Ah, but, but on to the next story. Speaking of hospitals, a five year old boy was left alone in the hospital on the day of his heart surgery. His anesthesiologist adopted him. This is in Omaha, Nebraska, the only town ever known in Nebraska. I don't know of any other town in Nebraska, but surrounded by friends and family and his birthday this week, 10 year old true bees of an Omaha, Nebraska. He's having a great day. Back in 2022, at the age of five, True needed a heart procedure for a serious congenital heart defect known as hypoplastic right heart syndrome. Jesus Christ. Are they just making words up? I feel like these doctors just take a bunch of their pharmaceuticals, get really high and they're like, all right, let's start naming shit. What should we name this? [00:19:31] Speaker C: It's Latin. [00:19:33] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean I've spoken, you know, alien when I'm fucking high on drugs. [00:19:39] Speaker C: No, but some, no, a lot of these words are just literally actual Latin. [00:19:44] Speaker A: Yeah. Fucking nerds. [00:19:46] Speaker C: Well, no, it's you. It's, everything's, it's, it's this way because it's recognized across other languages as this is the language of these scientific terms. [00:19:55] Speaker A: Okay, okay, okay. So, so I, I, I'm like, reading more into this story. He was under the care of social services at the time. On the day of the surgery, for an unknown reason, he was just dropped off at the Children's Nebraska Omaha Children's Hospital. Yeah, that. That. That's, you know, horrible. I feel terrible. [00:20:16] Speaker C: Is this some, like, letting your baby, like, float down on the river basket? [00:20:21] Speaker A: Well, he was already in, you know, CPS care. [00:20:25] Speaker C: I know. [00:20:26] Speaker A: Already, you know, taken away from the parents, but, you know, the social services are like, all right, we're gonna drop you off here. Good luck, kid. You know, get in. He's like, I don't know how to spell my name. I don't know what five year olds can do, but, you know, they just sent him in there, like, probably for, like, just like, a splinter or something. Like, all right, we're gonna give you a new heart and a new dad. His caseworker was sick with COVID on that day. Okay. It was unclear why no one else from social services was able to help them. The procedure lasted seven hours. And through it all, Boo just kept staring at the sweet face of the poor boy. Yeah, like that. That. That's nice that the anesthesiologist adopted him. The one that, like, kept him alive by, like, giving him just enough drugs, but not enough drugs. [00:21:35] Speaker C: Babe, that was actually really funny. [00:21:39] Speaker A: I mean, that. That's what you have to do. You have to just, you know, you have to. [00:21:42] Speaker C: That was really fucking funny. [00:21:43] Speaker A: You have to, like, thread that fine line. [00:21:45] Speaker C: Like, funny, smart. I really liked that. [00:21:49] Speaker A: It's like, I met him by giving him drugs, and now I'm his daddy. Daddy, can you bother me? Weed? No. Ah, that. That's a nice story. And I. I like, you know, good feely. Like that where it's like, oh, hell yeah. Like, radio. Like, do you ever see that movie? [00:22:12] Speaker C: I don't think so. [00:22:13] Speaker A: Courtney, you ever see Radio? [00:22:16] Speaker B: Radio? [00:22:17] Speaker A: Radio? Yeah. [00:22:17] Speaker B: I feel like it's vaguely familiar, but I probably, like, watched it a long time ago. [00:22:23] Speaker A: It's was Cuba Gooden Jr. And he's like a dude with, like, down syndrome or whatever. [00:22:30] Speaker B: I don't remember. [00:22:32] Speaker A: And, like, the football team starts bullying him, and the coach is like, don't bully him. He's retarded. And then, like, they all fall in love with him. Like, ah, he's actually pretty good. And, like, halfway through the movie, his mom dies. I'm like, no, why would you do that? Like, his mom was like, a nurse and just. I'm like, damn devastating you. You didn't even have to do that. And Then, like, coach, like, adopts him. I'm like, it was like, brutal. All right, next story. Alabama father, 99, and son, 80 years old, become the first ever pair to redeem the decades old promise of, of free oysters at a local oyster house. Now, if he gave me free oysters, I might take them. But Jimmy rush and his 99 year old father, Jim, have finally achieved one of their lifelong goals over at Wenzel Oyster House in downtown Mobile, Alabama, you know, which is another place that I, I'd love to live alongside with his dad and younger brother. A tradition that, you know, they, they're gonna go do like a Marty Gras parade. But there's a sign there that says, you know, free oysters. You know, for 80 year olds that bring in their dad, you know, it's obviously a, you know, a joke sign because if you're 80 years old, your dad's dead. But his dad survived. And then they came in, you know, 80 years old and 99 years old, and got like 12 free oysters. Now, if I live to like a hundred years old to get free oysters. Fuck that. That's a terrible prize. You're a hundred years old. Here's 12 free oysters. I could have just paid for them. It's fine. But apparently, like, they brought like their entire family and made it a whole big thing because, like, they're the first family to ever do this, you know, where it's like, you know, free whiskey tomorrow, you know, one of those dumb signs. But, you know, his brother is like a year younger than him. And so like, next year when his brother turns 80, they're gonna go do it again. It's like you could just keep coming in every day and just keep getting your free oysters. But I, I feel like oysters in Mobile, Alabama are like, not great oysters. [00:25:32] Speaker B: Yeah, I don't, I don't imagine they'd be good. [00:25:37] Speaker A: I. I mean, I'm sure they're. They're fine. Like, when I was young, like, I went with my dad to like, a seafood restaurant in Missouri called whippersnappers. I want, I wonder if this place is even still around. Whipper Snappers restaurant? Yeah. In Branson, Missouri. Holy. It's still around. Nope, nope. It's permanently closed. Never mind, never mind. [00:26:10] Speaker B: I hate when they, they psych you out. [00:26:13] Speaker A: Like it has the Facebook up, but. Yeah. [00:26:18] Speaker B: Wow. There was one in California. Oh, wait, no, I don't think it was. It's a Caribbean restaurant. So, no, it's not the same. [00:26:27] Speaker A: Yeah, where for Snappers Seafood only close to. Yeah, like, they, like, deleted all their things, and the only thing that they have up on their Facebook is 911 stuff. Oh, my God. Today we commemorate the 20th anniversary of the 911 packs. I'm like, jesus Christ. Still their phone number up and everything. Oh, my God. Yeah. Permanently closed, But, like, essentially it was a buffet where you can go in and get unlimited lobsters and unlimited crab and unlimited, you know, any seafood you wanted. [00:27:11] Speaker C: Oh, my God, I want crab now. [00:27:13] Speaker A: And if you don't know, Missouri is kind of like in the middle of the country, not next to oceans at all. And. [00:27:23] Speaker B: Did you get sick? [00:27:25] Speaker A: No, no, of course not. I'm a champion, you know, I. I never get sick. Oh, my. [00:27:35] Speaker B: You totally do not. [00:27:38] Speaker A: Not on Whiffer Snappers. Are you kidding me? I love it, though. They have 2.5 stars based on 35 reviews. You know, I. Okay, let's read some reviews on this place. One star. Thought we'd give it a chance. We ate here for breakfast over Memorial Day weekend. We asked a couple as they are leaving if the food is good. We should have listened. The bacon was so hard, we couldn't eat it. The French toast sticks were burnt so bad. They're completely black and crispy. Diet pepsi tasted like Dr. Pepper and Dr. Pepper was watered down. The fruit was mushy. We kept trying to find something that was edible. The waiter brought us a check for $54. We had enough. I asked for the manager. When he approached the table, he stated that there is nothing wrong with my food. He did offer half price for the meal, but the best price is. When we were leaving, the waiter, which I left a 10% tip, called us white trash. He said people like us make him sick. People like us, you know, are actually that expect to actually be able to eat the food. I will never eat here again. You know, very low quality. It's a sad day for tourist town. Good buffet. [00:29:08] Speaker C: No, no, I know what that means. Oh, I know what that means. [00:29:12] Speaker A: Food was a number one unacceptable. All the food was fried except for one item. The salad bar had a little lettuce and. And cherry tomatoes. If you're ever in Branson, don't eat there. They are pricey and not worth the money. Excellent crab legs and very good lobsters, though. You know, this one made us sick. Very sad. Oh, my gosh. Yep, that's ex. You know, like, I. I like to, you know, just, you know, live in my memory of the place being decent. You know, I like to just sit there and be like, yeah, that was great. I could have as many lobsters, but, you know, I'm sitting there eating these lobsters. I'm like, we're. We're nowhere near lobsters. I'm like, this is suspicious. It's like when you're in the end of the world and you get, like, a steak, and you're like, what the. Did you get a steak? I don't know where. Where. What. What is this? What am I eating? Is this a human? Am I eating a human right now? Okay, the human's pretty good. Okay, never mind. I just will stop asking questions now. But surprisingly, Alabama is not a state that I've ever been to, is one of the very few that I've never been to. Now I want to go. I want to go in and be like, you know, with, like, my buddy Ben. I'm like, he identifies as my dad, and he identifies as 80 years old. I identify as 80 years old, you know, as his son. Give us our free things. I'll just kick us out. Yeah. I never understood oyster houses. Like, they're not that great. [00:31:15] Speaker C: Oysters and mussels are. Are different, right? [00:31:18] Speaker A: Yeah, but they both taste like boogers. Ah, Jesus Christ. Yeah, these. These people are old. These people are secondhand lions. Old, but good for them. They got to eat free oysters for living way too long. [00:31:38] Speaker C: I agree with you. It doesn't seem a just reward. [00:31:40] Speaker A: Nope. But now on to Am I the by Moonstalker. Am I the for being mad at my boyfriend after he got grossed out by me during sex? My boyfriend is 20 and me 21, so you're both children. That's adorable. Horrible. We were having sex as usual. I was very aroused, so obviously I was wet when we started having sex. He saw a lot of my discharge, which is just natural lubricant that comes out of the vagina on his penis. He immediately went soft and stopped having sex. [00:32:23] Speaker B: What? [00:32:24] Speaker A: I was a little surprised because this always happens when we have sex, but this time I could see it bothered him. I asked him if he was a grossed out, and he responded, yes, a little. Actually, I was taken aback by this and said it was normal and that I was just super turned on. He said, I don't think that's what it means. I have had a vagina my whole life, so I think I know better than anyone else. This pissed me off. He told me that it wasn't a big deal, and I just feel extremely offended when, like, he's disgusted by my vagina. Am I the asshole, sir? Grow up. You know, Just grow up. Like, you'll be fine. You'll. You'll hit your 30s and hit your stride and just be like, I don't care. You know, just go with the flow. You know, take a fart to the face and make, yeah, whatever. It's fine. Keep it going. But yeah, no, he. He's 20, so he's. He's still a little baby, you know? You know, he. He's only, you know, a couple years in the game, you know, Give him a few more years, you know, but, no, you're not the. [00:33:46] Speaker C: I feel bad for Opie's boyfriend. [00:33:47] Speaker A: Was this his first time seeing a vagina? [00:33:50] Speaker C: Like, yes, that's what I was thinking. [00:33:51] Speaker A: Sex works because of those FL. Fluids. He's giving this vagina one star. He's like, it made me sick. I'm never eating here again. It discharged. She liked it too much, and I did not like it. Does he think the vaginas make crystal clear, odorless, colorless magic oil? Never go down on T because semen looks gross. Fair is fair. All you have to do is tell him that it's his come, that his penis is scraping the old come out. And then, you know that that's how you break up with him. He's like, oh, I'm getting out of here. And then he, you know, stays single for the rest of his life because he's ignorant. I mean, to be fair, I'm like, yeah, it's probably what it is. Whatever. It's fine. Let's roll with it. You know, if it's my comments, my, you know, it's fine. But. But now for this poor guy here, like, I. I, you know, found two that kind of, like, linked. This is Ask MenAdvice by news seesaw. How can I tell my partner that this is okay? Hey, everyone. I'm 38 and female, and I've been with my partner, 29, female, for 1.5 years. We are very happy together, and he recently told me that he's been self conscious about not being able to last as long. When we first got together, we'd have sex for about 30 minutes to an hour, which was very fun. Right now we have about 10 to 15 minute sessions, which I also enjoy very much. He told me that he can't last as long anymore. I've tried to reassure him that I am happy and I don't mind as long as he is satisfied. I am too. But he seems down about it. He also finished within 30 seconds once, and he was upset. I guess this is a guy Thing I don't understand why I find it cute. He is the only guy I've been with. I try and ask him to get some insight, but he steers away from that conversation. How can I assure him that he doesn't have to last that long for me or feel down about it? What changes from being able to last an hour to not lasting long anymore? I mean, getting old, I guess, being more efficient. [00:36:38] Speaker C: Okay, the problem is the way she said, is it just a guy thing? That's precisely how I feel about it. [00:36:47] Speaker A: See, what you do is you, you know, tell them to, like, focus on you, you know, back. Focus here. You know, get down there and eat. I mean, you're, you know, 29 years old, so, you know, he. He's a. A man at this point. He. He's not being grossed out by anything. You know, just tell him to, you know, take care of you, and then, you know, pound away for, you know, 30 seconds, and boom, high five. And then you're done. What. What does that look for, Courtney? [00:37:23] Speaker B: I. Honestly, I zoned out for part of what you read the story, and I have no idea what you guys are talking about. [00:37:29] Speaker A: So Opie's girlfriend is, you know, has a boyfriend for a year and a half that, you know, used to. For a long time. And, you know, he was, like, a. A good long. And now he, like, you know, comes quick, like, 911 in white neighborhoods. [00:37:48] Speaker B: Oh. And so toys. [00:37:52] Speaker A: Yeah. You know, tell your, you know, boyfriend to, you know, shove toys in you, get you off, and then it's like, boom. You know, you did your job. Here's your reward. You know, get in there and, you know, pound away, get your nut. High five. Go back to playing Call of Duty. That's how that goes, honestly. So, I mean. I mean, what. [00:38:25] Speaker B: What. [00:38:25] Speaker A: What do you think, babe? [00:38:31] Speaker C: It doesn't matter. [00:38:33] Speaker A: But, like, how. How? [00:38:34] Speaker C: Like, no, it doesn't matter. Like, it does not matter to me. Like, I don't understand why this is a thing. [00:38:45] Speaker A: Like, dudes that don't last long, it's like an emasculating thing to them. [00:38:49] Speaker C: I don't understand why [00:38:53] Speaker A: it's, you know, because you. You think of, you know, being able to, like, for a long time be like, yeah, that's, like, the manliest thing you can do, you know, but it's not. I. I mean, like, you know, like, we find it manly to, like, bring pleasure to a woman and. And then, you know, for, like, a while and not just be like, you know, boom. You know, like a handshake, essentially. With genitals and, like, all right, it's over. Bye. [00:39:26] Speaker B: Yeah, but quite honestly, also, maybe he should get checked out medically, because if he's, like, coming really fast, like, that could. Could mean something's happening with him. [00:39:37] Speaker C: You're right. It would be worth going to a doctor. It would be worth going to a doctor, Yeah. [00:39:43] Speaker A: I mean, I don't think it's a problem. I mean, it just means he's attracted to you and he likes you more, you know, how often do you. If you. More, you know. Here, like, give him this bit of advice, Opie. If you ever do. Do hear this, tell him to, like, jerk off, like, an hour before you're, you know, planning on having sex. You know, you're almost in your 30s. I'm sure you playing this. You know, tell him, like, jerk off like, an hour before, two hours before, and he will last much longer. It is a, you know, tried and true trick that every guy knows, except for this guy, apparently. So, yeah, just, you know, just boom. Fucking bust a nut, you know, a little bit before, and then you're. You're all golden. Hell, yeah. So. But that's gonna be it for this week. That's gonna be it for this episode. We'll be back in one week with some more shit that, you know, y' all love. Until then, bye. [00:40:54] Speaker C: Bye. [00:40:55] Speaker B: Bye.